2005 in Review

Since I'm a shameless follower, I'm going to take the lead of several others who have listed their favorite memories/highlights of the year. I was going to try and list one for each month, but really, my life's too boring. So here's a random list of the best of my year, or the most memorable (memorable after all doesn't always mean wonderful, but still worthy of noting):

1. Making my debut as a guitar player at BBC in January. It was my first live performance, and it probably will be my only live performance, not because I got booed off stage or anything (although that would have been understandable), but because I haven't picked up the guitar in months. That's pretty sad, actually. But I'm not here to list regrets of 2005, so moving on).

2. Applying to and being accepted to graduate school. This of course was a long and stressful process that fortunately had a positive outcome-UT was brave enough to accept me and pay me to go to school. (I won't dwell on the schools who weren't so brave. I'm not here to list the dumbest schools of 2005, either.)

3. Visiting my dearest friend in the world, Emily Vassar, in Seattle. I got to see one of my other friends get married while I was there, Em and I had lots of good girl talk time, and I fell in love with the city. I want to go back. (I won't mention the temporary anxiety that losing my luggage caused, since it was eventually recovered. I'm not listing the worst moments of 2005.)

4. My parents selling our house of 20 years and moving to north Bartlett. This was quite traumatic for me, as long time readers of my blog may recall, but it was good for me to go through that change, and my parents are so happy in their new house that I can't hold it against them.

5. Making the trip from Bartlett to Knoxville and back in one day. My roomie Elizabeth accompanied me on this little adventure, and it was a great chance for us to bond, listen to some great music, and laugh about my poor navigational and driving skills. (I won't mention the asinine reason for this marathon trip, since I'm also not listing the year's lamest excuses for a road trip.)

6. Settling into my very first apartment. It has been so great to have a place to call home in Knoxville, and I am so blessed to have a roommate like Liz to make it even more homey. We got to decorate things the way we wanted, and we even had our own Christmas tree. I look forward to more memories in our little nest.

7. Spending the weekend in Nashville with my friend Diana. Diana is my closest friend in Knoxville, and we had a blast in Nashville seeing Jason Mraz in concert, watching The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe, and attending the Andrew Peterson Christmas concert. Not to mention the excellent dinner we had that Sunday night at Amerigo's. It was the perfect weekend.

8. Attending a UT home game. Liz and I were fortunate enough to get front-row seats, and even though I don't even like football all that much, it was really exciting to be among all of the rabid, insane fans.

9. Going to a poetry slam. Most of the adventure involved with this particular event involved just getting there, as my friends and I couldn't seem to find the place where the slam was taking place, and then when we finally got there, thinking we were so late, there was virtually no one there (except the performers), and we ended up sitting in this rather shady bar alone for a good hour and a half. We had a blast, though, and the poetry slam was awesome, especially since we got to be judges.

10. Attending youth camp in July. I had a great time hanging out with some awesome members of the youth group, hearing some truthful, hard-hitting preaching, and getting in a little beach time. I went on this trip right before I moved, and it was a great way to end my time in Bartlett.

Honorable mentions: Getting my hair chopped off (which was kind of nerve-racking but a good change), teaching Sunday School, watching The Wizard of Oz outside in Market Square, my birthday celebration at P.F. Chang's and the club whose name I don't remember, and seeing Kelly Clarkson in concert.

Wow, not a bad year. It seemed pretty bad at times, but there have been so many blessings that I hope that when I look back on 2005, I remember the good and not the bad.

The Year's Best Music

Since the end of the year is fast approaching, I thought I'd make a list of my personal favorite albums of 2005.  All of these were released this year, and even though there are many more that I could list, these are the cream of the crop, in my opinion.  Obviously, since they're my favorites I think you all should own each of them.  (And by "own" I mean "purchase with money," not "download for free".)  In case you want to download some individual songs on iTunes or a comparable service, I've taken the liberty of listing my favorite songs from each of the albums to get you started.  Here they are, beginning with my favorite of the year:

1.  Bethany Dillon, Imagination: I can't get enough of Bethany Dillon.  She's quickly becoming my favorite artist.  I can listen to this whole CD straight through and then start all over again and not even mind.  Personal favorites: "Hallelujah," "My Love Hasn't Grown Cold," and "Be Near Me."
2.  Nichole Nordeman, Brave:  Nichole's one of my heroes: she's a fabulous singer who writes with passion, conviction, and honesty.  My personal favorites from the album: "Lay It Down," "Brave," and "Hold On."
3.  Jason Mraz, Mr. A-Z:  He's just such a witty songwriter, and all of his songs are so different.  Personal favorites: "Life is Wonderful" (probably one of my favorite songs EVER), "Geek in the Pink," and "Song for a Friend."
4.  Coldplay, X&Y: While not my favorite Coldplay album (I think the second one will always be my favorite), this one is still praiseworthy, if not all that groundbreaking.  Personal favorites: "Fix You," "What If?" and "Swallowed in the Sea."
5.  David Crowder Band, A Collision:  DCB is so innovative, so fresh, and so fun.  I just love this CD.  Personal favorites:  "Here is our King," "Foreverandever etc." and "Beautiful Collision."
6.  Switchfoot, Nothing is Sound:  Another album I can listen to straight through and then start it again.  Personal favorites: "Lonely Nation," "The Shadow Proves the Sunshine," and "The Blues."
7.  The Afters, I Wish We All Could Win:  This new group has a tight, polished sound and excellent lyrics.  I hope they continue making a name for themselves.  Personal favorites: "Beautiful Love," "Someday," and "Wait."
8.  Jack Johnson, In Between Dreams:  This was my intro to Jack Johnson, and I must say, I love him.  He's great for mellow, rainy afternoons or just about any other time.  Personal favorites:  "Banana Pancakes, "Better Together," and "Sitting Waiting Wishing."
9.  Lifehouse, Lifehouse:  Seeing Lifehouse live only increased my appreciation for them.  Personal favorites: "Blind" (the music video interprets the song in a way I hadn't even considered), "You and Me," and "Undone."
10.  Todd Agnew, Reflection of Something:  I have to say that this isn't my favorite album of Agnew's, but it has some of my favorite songs on it, so it makes the cut.  Personal favorites:  "My Jesus" (these lyrics are incredible), "Isaiah 6," and "Something Beautiful."

What are your favorites?

BEFORE:

AFTER:

Hmm, maybe I should have stuck with "before." 

My new profile pic was taken with the digital camera I got for Christmas, as were the pictures of Bear in the post below this one. I've been snapping pictures like crazy ever since I got the camera. It's been over a year since I had a camera of any kind, so I guess all of my pent up photo-taking energy has taken over. Digital cameras really are genius. It's so nice being able to see what the picture looks like right after you take it, and then you can just delete it on the spot if you want and take another one!

In other news, I've hardly read at all this entire break. I'm quite troubled by this. I love reading. I used to read all the time, and I was very much looking forward to this break so I could read whatever I wanted, but now that it's here and I have hours of free time, I don't read. I've only read about seventy pages of Uncle Tom's Cabin, and normally I would have been on my third book by now. What's wrong with me?? Maybe my brain is tired. That sounds stupid, though, so I don't know.

I do know that I'd forgotten how nice it is to have options in my TV viewing. My parents have a satellite, so there are just endless channels! (Oddly enough, sometimes it still seems like there's nothing on. Strange.) In Knoxville we have like 2 channels, but now I could watch those dreadfully insipid yet mysteriously addictive Lifetime movies 24/7 if I wanted.

Anyway, my life's pretty boring at the moment, so there's nothing much to report. I saw Cheaper by the Dozen 2 today. It was pretty funny, but definitely see a matinee, or wait for it to come out on video. It's not really worth $8. Oh, and if anyone's interested, tomorrow Bath and Body Works begins their wonderful semi-annual sale. You can get some really good deals, but it's only for 3 days, I think, so hurry! Enjoy your week, everyone!

A New Addition to the Family

I know you all were just dying to know what my brother got for Christmas, so I suppose I should go ahead and tell you, or perhaps showing would be better.  Welcome the newest addition to the Hetzel family: Bear!  He's definitely the cutest Hetzel, that's for sure! 

Here's another one:

I mean, seriously, is that not the cutest little puppy you've ever seen??  Unfortunately, our other dog, Sandy, doesn't think so.  She's been upset since Bear got here last night.  We knew that the puppy might be leaving little "presents" around the house for us to clean up, but so far the only messes we've cleaned up have been Sandy's (Sandy is 11 years old).  And each time she's done it right in front of us, as if to spite us and let us know that she does not welcome this little pup like we do.  And any time Bear would go near Sandy, Sandy just growled and would refuse to bond with the poor little guy.  Oh well, hopefully Sandy will calm down and realize that she may as well deal with Bear, since he's not going anywhere, at least not until my brother and his fiancee find a house and he moves out.  (So Bear could be around until June at the latest.)  Until then, Bear stays up in Brandon's room or underneath our watchful eyes, lest Sandy decides to make a meal out of him or something. 

The Christmas Eve service last night at church was lovely, if not really brief.  We were out of there in about 30 minutes, but I just love when we have candlelight services; it's just so peaceful and warm and inviting and reverent.  This morning was also good, and it was nice that my family and Nikki's family (my brother's fiancee) took up a whole row!  I love my family. 

I hope everyone else has had a merry Christmas.  Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night! 

P.S. My brother gave me the fifth season of Gilmore Girls, and my mom and I have already watched the first eight episodes.  Good times indeed!

Ah, Memory Lane

Tonight my parents and I watched Batman Begins again, and then we decided to dig out some of the home movies and watch them. First up: my 6th birthday party at the greatest place on earth--McDonald's. Let me tell you, that was one boring party. It seemed like we just sat there and ate forever. My favorite exchange:
Me: "I don't like my brother."
One of the parents supervising: "Oh, sure you do."
Me: "No, really, I don't."

HA! Things got a little more interesting when we moved the party outside to the playground, which definitely is different from the bright plastic elaborate monstrosities kids have these days. This little play area had a wooden slide that also had one of those big steering wheels and a curved window on the side of it; one of those big saucer-like things that you pile into and turn with a wheel; and a plastic jungle gym-type thing. Now, I don't remember the last time I saw a wooden anything on a playground. Anyway, favorite outside moment: me standing on the outside of the saucer thing and going to turn it but instead banging my head on the side and falling to the ground. I think we rewound that part and watched it about four times. It was so funny! And I was a big girl; I didn't even cry! My brother was also really funny, as every five minutes he would do these crazy gestures and say, "I'm Peewee Herman!" He was so cute but so loud, and when we were watching it my mom said, "You know, I think he had ADD." But he turned out okay. Hehe.

We also watched portions of mine and Brandon's old dance recitals. (There's a little Erin trivia for you: I took tap and jazz lesson for 6 years. Apparently it didn't stick, though because I'm the worst dancer on the planet.) It was so weird to see how little we were, and how completely different we looked. Seeing myself that young and watching my parents' reaction to seeing my brother and me that young was really fun, though. We should do that more often. (And we will: tomorrow when my brother and his fiancee are over, we're totally going to show Nikki what she's marrying into.)

Speaking of tomorrow, I don't know that I've ever been so excited for anyone to get a present as I am for my brother to get his. I don't think he has any idea what my parents got him, but I'm not gonna lie; it's good. We do a Christmas Eve gift exchange, so tomorrow he will get it, and it's going to be so fun! Until then you'll just have to wait to see what it is.

I hope all of you have a wonderfully happy Christmas, and remember to thank the Lord for sending His Son to die that we might live for Him!

Out of the Mouths of Babes...

Every year, the Bartlett Express publishes letters to Santa that kids in elementary school write in their classes, and some of them are hilarious. I thought I would share a few of the truly priceless ones for my readers. (All spelling and grammar is unedited. It's cuter that way.) Enjoy!

Dear Santa,

I want a 100 dollar bill and a pony.

* * *

Dear Santa,

I have a computer and the sky Hi movie. Merry Christmas. (If he has these things, why is he writing Santa? Haha.)

* * *

Dear Santa,

I dont no what I want I will think of something. Merry christmas.

* * *

Dear Santa,

May I please Have a Rmot Kchrl Dog? I have been good this year. Merry Christma! (I think she was asking for a remote control dog?)

* * *

Dear Santa,

I hope everyone wil have a great Christmas. What I want for Christmas is a laptop? I want most of all is my Christmas too be just right. One big big big bag of candy. One mor thing is for my dog too get the this lamp shad off. (Lamp shade?? Do we even want to know?)

* * *

Dear Santa,

I know you haft to driv a long way. I need toys candy choclet and love. (Aww.) I want a makeup set with a desk and cher. (Does she mean the singer? Hehe.) I want a word wall to.

* * *

Dear St. Nick,

I have been a good girl. How are your raindr? For Christmas I want a tomugae. (A what?)

* * *

Here's a great P.S. from one letter:

P.S. My mom wants my little sister to get potty-trained. Oh, please let it be a white Christmas.

* * *

Dear Santa,

I love Christmas. How bo reindeer fly. And how bo elfs make toys. I wonder woh Rodalfs mother is.

* * *

Dear Santa,

I don't want anything for Christmas. But for everyone to have a nice Christmas.
P.S. Nick said hello. (That's so sweet!)

* * *

Dear Santa,

You are the nicest man in the world. Say hi to Mrs. Claus for me. please don't give my dog anything. Give My Ma everything she wanted. (And another awww!)

* * *

This last one had my parents and I laughing forever, but we have no idea what the boy actually wants. Can anyone decipher this?

Dear Santa,

May I please have this? The stem tomis and that thang tanstsin to 4 thangs. I have been good this year. Merry Chrismus.

I mean, "stem tomis and that thang tanstsin"? What could that possibly be??? Kids are so cute!

Heavenly Ruminations

Warning: this is long.

Because I'm a nerd, I was reading Reader's Digest today, and there was an article about Barbara Walter's research on the question of heaven-what is it and how do we get there? There was also a 2-hour special on ABC last week, I think, and I wish I had gotten to watch all of it because I think it would have given more details than the article. Anyway, Walters spent a year researching, interviewing people from all types of religions and walks of life, and I was struck by a few things, one of them being Walters's asking a priest (the Archbishop of Washington, D.C., specifically) if there would be sex in heaven. His reply? "That was a question they asked the Lord, and the answer was no." First of all, who are "they"? I hate it when people use a blanket pronoun to refer to some invisible voice of consensus. It's a simple case of a pronoun without a referent, people. I personally had never thought about whether or not there would be sex in heaven. It's a compelling question, though. I know Muslims believe there will be sex in heaven (or paradise, as they refer to it), and the article says the Koran mentions sex in heaven specifically, but the Bible certainly doesn't. What do you think? And will there be marriage in heaven? I am skeptical about there being sex in heaven, but I'll get to my reasons for thinking so in a moment.

One other interesting quote in the article was by Billy Graham. He said, "I look forward to the reunion with friends and loved ones who have gone on before. I look forward to heaven's freedom from sorrow and pain." I have a problem with this quote, for several reasons, the first of which being the absence of a key figure. GOD. I've always had a problem with descriptions of heaven that liken it to a family reunion. That was always a big part of my church's past presentations of heaven in the Judgment Houses we did, and I just have to wonder how much of that will be true. I'm not at all trying to be insensitive to those who have lost loved ones who are now in heaven, but my concern is that the focus when we think about heaven is not where it should be-on Jesus.

Can you just imagine it? Heaven will be a reunion, but it will be a reunion of the Bridegroom and His bride, the Church. We will at last be in the presence of the Lord, the Maker of Heaven and Earth, the One who was before all things and controls all things. The Lord whose earth is merely His footstool (see Isaiah 66:1), who measures the waters in the palm of His hand, judges in wisdom and in power, knows my every thought and action before they come to be. In the presence of such magnificence, such wonder, how could we dare to think of anyone or anything else? Is it any wonder that the book of Revelation depicts creation worshipping before the throne of God? Does it not say in Philippians 2:10 that at the name of Jesus every knee shall bow, in heaven and earth, and every tongue confess that He is Lord? It will be all about Him, day in and day out. Our hearts and minds will be consumed with the Lord, and of course we will want it to be no other way.

So will there be sex in heaven? Will we be reunited with our relatives? I don't know, but I have a hard time believing that we will even care about those things. How could we when face to face with the One who gave us life and gave His life so we might one day be with Him? My challenge in the here and now is to be more eternally-minded, to have a heart that beats for the things of God, the eternal things and not the temporal things (see 2 Corinthians 4:16-18). And I pray too that we might realize the power of the truths depicted in 2 Corinthians 5:1-10: "1Now we know that if the earthly tent we live in is destroyed, we have a building from God, an eternal house in heaven, not built by human hands. 2Meanwhile we groan, longing to be clothed with our heavenly dwelling, 3because when we are clothed, we will not be found naked. 4For while we are in this tent, we groan and are burdened, because we do not wish to be unclothed but to be clothed with our heavenly dwelling, so that what is mortal may be swallowed up by life. 5Now it is God who has made us for this very purpose and has given us the Spirit as a deposit, guaranteeing what is to come.

6Therefore we are always confident and know that as long as we are at home in the body we are away from the Lord. 7We live by faith, not by sight. 8We are confident, I say, and would prefer to be away from the body and at home with the Lord. 9So we make it our goal to please him, whether we are at home in the body or away from it. 10For we must all appear before the judgment seat of Christ, that each one may receive what is due him for the things done while in the body, whether good or bad." (emphasis mine)

Am I making it my goal to please Him? Are you?

What a weekend!

Highlights from my weekend:

1. Eating at Olive Garden with my parents. Yummy.
2. Seeing my friend Erin and her 3-week-old little girl. I stayed the night with her on Friday because her husband went out of town, and we had such a sweet time together. It was so wonderful to just hold a baby.
3. Shopping with my friend Lindsay on Saturday. The shopping itself wasn't fun because it took a really long time and everyone and their dog was at the mall or the surrounding vicinity this weekend (naturally), but it was my only chance to see Linds before she departed for Costa Rica for the whole break.
4. Starbucks on Saturday night with Lindsay. We had a good heart-to-heart, and it did me a world of good.
5. Learning how to play Texas Hold 'Em after church tonight. I stink at poker, but it was lots of fun since we don't actually play with real money. Maybe I'll get better at it.

That's all for now. My dad's study (where I'm typing this) is cold, and my warm bed is calling my name. To those of you who have to go to work tomorrow, you have my most heartfelt sympathy.

Oh, and I totally forgot to ask if anyone else watched The Apprentice finale and was totally shocked at the completely jerky behavior of Randal in the last 2 minutes. I was so mad! I mean, I understand he wanted to win and all, but why would it have been such a huge deal for Trump to hire Rebecca too? I lost all respect for Randal because of his comments at the end of the show. He was just too petty.

It's a Miracle!!!

Guess who got straight A's for her first semester in grad school? ME!!!! I seriously cannot believe it. My theory class was kicking my butt. I honestly was ready to get a B. Oh my word, I am so excited. I am so so so so so so EXCITED! And I just called my friend Sarah to tell her, and she was like, "I'm not listening to you worry about your grades any more! It always turns out the same. Haven't you learned a lesson today?" Hee. This is just the best Christmas present ever. Thank you, Jesus!

'Tis the Season to Watch Movies

I thought today might be as good a day as any to list my top favorite movies to watch during the holiday season. They are not all specifically about Christmas, but Christmas is in all of them, so that's good enough. No holiday season is complete without watching these movies, in my not-so-humble opinion.

5. A Christmas Story: My entire family dreads the day that TNT runs this movie for 24 hours straight, but I absolutely love it. It's such a classic. Favorite scene: when the fam goes to the Chinese restaurant for Christmas dinner after the dogs devour the turkey.

4. While You Were Sleeping: No matter how many times I watch this movie, I get all teary-eyed when Lucy, Sandra Bullocks character calls off the wedding and then talks about how much she loves Peter's family because she hasn't had a family of her own for a long time. Sniff sniff. And of course I totally fell in love with Bill Pullman's character and the fact that he gave her that stamp in her passport.

3. Sleepless in Seattle: This is a great movie to watch anytime, but for some reason I love watching it around Christmas. So many quotable lines, and Meg Ryan and Tom Hanks together is just fabulous. Favorite scene: It's hard to choose a favorite, so I'll go with the scene that makes me giggle every time--the one where Rita Wilson's character is talking about An Affair to Remember (which I never thought was that great) and gets all weepy, so then Tom Hanks and Victor Garber (whom I LOVE) start talking about a movie (Dirty Dozen, I think?) and fake cry, and Victor Garber ends it by saying, "God, I love that movie." Hee.

2. Little Women: This is one example of a great adaption of a book. I love the 1994 version best, but I haven't seen all of the other versions. It's just so heartwarming and full of lovely cinematography, and I cry every time I watch it. Favorite scene: The ending. It's just perfect, with Jo and Professor Bhaer standing in the rain, alive with the realization of their love. And then after Friedrich says he has nothing to offer her, that his hands are empty, she places her hands in his and says, "Not empty now." Awwww. I love it. (A close second favorite scene is when Friedrich and Jo are at the opera, Friedrich translates for Jo, they almost kiss, are interrupted, then kiss for real. So sweet!)

1. White Christmas/Holiday Inn: I had to put both of these in the number one spot because I love them both equally. They're both musicals, both have Bing Crosby, and both feature the song "White Christmas." What more could you want?

What are your favorite holiday movies?

The end has come!x

I've been up since 7 am on Monday morning (with the exception of about 30 minutes sometime in the middle of the night), but I finished my project, turned it in, and now I'm officially finished with my first semester of grad school. I don't think I could be more relieved if I tried. There is really no way I would have made it at all if not for God helping me to get out of bed every day. It's been a long, hard semester, but it hasn't been without it's blessings, and I must always remember that. And now I can put it behind me, accept my B's if they come (*cringe*), and read for fun until January 11! Except that I also need to start tackling the MA comp. reading list. It's over 7 pages worth of books, and I've read 2 of them. (Okay, so that's a lie. I think I've read 5.) First on the list: Uncle Tom's Cabin. I've been meaning to read it for about a decade now, and it's on the reading list, so I'm killing two birds with one stone (I wish there were a better way to convey that idea without having to resort to using a cliche, but there you have it.)

Well kids, the keys on the keyboard are starting to run together, so I think it's about time I got some sleep. (And some food.) Look for more lucid posts in the days ahead. Ah, the joys of Christmas break...

I've been up all night. My life stinks. Or more specifically, Old English stinks.

The Internet is evil. I can't do my homework.

Hello friends! I'm writing you from this completely deserted but totally cool cafe with wireless internet. Diana and I were both suffering internet withdrawals, so we had to make a stop. :) And let me just tell you all how incredibly amazing the Jason Mraz concert was. That boy is so talented. If any of you are even remotely fond of Jason Mraz, you simply must see him in concert. Sometimes live perfomrances are risky because not all artists are good live performers or they are really boring because they don't know how to be entertaining, but Jason Mraz is both a good performer and a good entertainer. Actually, he's the BEST. He didn't even sing my favorite songs ("Life is Wonderful," "Absolutely Zero," or "Plane"), but he did all of the songs he did sing so well that it was hard to get upset about it. He is just the goofiest, funniest, cutest, bestest singer. I could go on and on all day. (And for those of you who know his newest album, he sang "Mr. Curiosity," and his little operatic performance at the end of that song is even better than on the CD. He just kept going and going, and I was just a-swoonin'.) So yeah, all of you should be sad you missed it. I'm sad it is over. I would go see him again tomorrow if I could.

Narnia was good, but I feel like it should have its own post, so you'll just have to wait to hear my review. Enjoy the rest of your weekend, peeps!

I took my final. It was hard. I feel like I studied all the wrong things. I hope I at least will manage a B for the class. Any lower, and I'm dead. I've never gotten a B in an English class before. Boo. But at least I'm done!! And I turned in a project for my research class, so all that's left is to finish my Old English project by Tuesday, which I think I can do.

Now I must you bid you adieu for the weekend, friends. I am going to Nashville for the weekend with Diana, and here are just some of the awesome things we are going to do:

Tonight: Jason Mraz in concert, 2nd row seats
Tomorrow: Chronicles of Narnia, Christmas shopping
Sunday: Dinner at Amerigo's, which Diana says is the best Italian food ever, and then Andrew Peterson in concert at the Ryman Auditorium

Aren't you jealous? But really, after the h-e-double hockeysticks that was the past two weeks, I deserve it! Have a great weekend!!!

He was injured; he was injured bad...

Okay, so Rachel posted a link to a hilarious video that I think you all should watch. Seriously, click that link. You won't regret it. My friend showed it to me last week at school, and we were laughing so hard people came to see what all the ruckus was about.

In other news, I think my brain might explode. I've been studying for two days straight for my theory final. I know it seems like all I talk about is my theory class, but that's only because it absorbs all of my energy. The final is tomorrow, and then I will finally be done with theory forever!! I can't even tell you how much that excites me. Some people get all riled up and energized by literary theory, but it makes me want to a) throw up, b) throw things or c) throw in the towel. (Did you like my little parallelism there?) Tomorrow after 12:15 I can say, "Adios, theory!" Not that I won't ever have to use it again because I totally will, but at least I won't have to read all those dreadful primary texts. Hallelujah!

Greatest Roomie Ever!

Yes, that's right, I have the greatest roomie ever! Even though she killed her xanga several months ago (much to my chagrin), apparently she still reads mine religiously (and who can blame her?). A few weeks ago I wrote about a certain book I wanted, and today I opened the Christmas present Liz got me, and guess what it is? The Smithsonian Book of Books! It's just as lovely as I remember it being. I can't wait until my break when I can just read it from cover to cover. I love being a nerd! And I love my roomie!

Worth Featuring

Have you guys ever checked out the "featured content" on the Xanga homepage? I was curious, so just a little while ago I clicked on some of the links. Well, the first person's didn't seem all that special to me-just some rant about a guy stealing this guy's profile pics and using them on Friendster, but he had over 60 eprops. Then there was another one that basically just thanked all of his "xanga friends" for subscribing, and he had over 60 eprops as well. (For the record, I did a post very similar to that not too long ago, and I got a whopping 6 eprops. Clearly I'm doing something wrong.). This guy also spelled words in that annoying way I hate: "bi" for "by", "bcuz" for "because", etc., and he's a member of a blogring called "Jesus Loves Notre Dame!!!," and that disturbs me on several levels I won't get into right now. But anyway, I'm not writing this to criticize these people, I'm just wondering how it is they get 60+ people(or 100+ in the case of some other guy) to comment on their site. I mean, I have 75 subscribers, so technically I could be in the running if all of you commented, but I suppose my entries aren't quite so exciting (and you all have lives). But none of the sites I read were incredibly thought-provoking or even all that entertaining (except for one talking about toilets in Japan that wash your behind), until finally I read one that really struck me. It really is worth featuring and is incredibly brave, so go check it out!

Imagine that the Hallelujah Chorus is playing in the background. Now imagine me grinning from ear to ear. I turned in my paper today! Woohoo! I even went over the minimum page limit, which I never do. I don't really think it makes a lot of sense, and after I turned it in I realized I hadn't so much proofread it, but you know what? I don't care. It's done, I'm through, and no more theory for me! (There is that small matter of a final, but my sleep deprivation has me excited about everything, so I don't care.) Yippeeeeeee!

The only thing that would make me happier is if Gilmore Girls weren't a rerun this week. It's just as well that it is, I suppose, since I still have a ton of work to do. But still, I'm so close to having this hellacious semester behind me. Praise the Lord for getting me through it with most of my sanity! I've now turned my thoughts to how I will spend the month I have off from school, and the possibilities are endless, but I've started a short list:

1. Write the great American novel (No big deal, right?).
2. Exercise on my parent's treadmill.
3. Read for fun! (Any suggestions?)
4. Go see all the movies I want to see (Narnia, King Kong, Walk the Line, Memoirs of a Geisha, among others.)
5. Sleep past 8 every day (except Sundays).
6. Write three new poems.
7. Relax.

That's a pretty good start, eh? If anyone cares to make additional suggestions, feel free!

I would also like to express my supreme disappoint in the meteorological system, as there was no snow today. The forecast miraculously changed sometime today from "scattered snow showers" to "cloudy." What a letdown. They're now predicting snow showers for Thursday, but after my premature excitement I can scarcely dare to hope. (See what optimism gets me? Kidding. Sort of.)

My lovely, new, readable background is courtesy of Steven. And if you read the comments in my previous post, you would see that he also shared news that I was aware of but nevertheless very excited about. Snow is on the forecast for tomorrow! Here is the forecast from Yahoo! Weather: Rain showers early mixing with snow showers later in the day. Cooler. High 41F. Winds N at 5 to 10 mph. Chance of precip 60%. Snow showers, people! I know I really shouldn't be getting all that excited because Tennessee weather is notoriously mercurial, but I can't help myself. I love snow, and we never get enough (or any sometimes), so if I could just see a little before I go home for a few weeks, I would be ecstatic. And then there's the fact that I absolutely hate driving in snow, but I'm not gonna dwell on that. Nor am I going to complain about my paper, or anything else, for the rest of the week. I'm aware that I've been downright whiny lately, and I know no one loves reading that, so I'm suspending my negativity for a week. (Baby steps, people, baby steps.) Then if that works, I may even try for two weeks! I don't know if it's possible to be born naturally pessimistic, but if it is, then I was. That does not, however, mean I have to stay that way. So optimism, here I come! (I hope this works. Hehe.)

Four pages down, six to go. Anyone got any feminist approaches to the "Wife of Bath's Tale" lying around? Yeah, me either.

I had my last day of theory class today! One class down, two to go. Unfortunately, I still have TONS of work to do. Like a paper for said theory class that's due Monday. How much of it do I have written, you ask? Why, none of it! Every day this week I have sat at my computer, staring at the blinking cursor, wondering how in the world I am going to write this paper. And every day I come up with nothing. And every day my feelings have ranged from complete stupidity to apathy, the latter of which has become a staple of my life this semester, and it needs to go away.

Part of me just really doesn't care how I do on this paper. Part of me hopes that I fail so I will have a legitimate reason to quit grad school. Part of me wants desperately to be smarter. And none of these parts are good things. I'm not used to not caring; it used to be that I cared too much. I certainly have never wanted to fail before; if I got a B on a paper the world came crashing down. I can't just make myself smarter, and comparing myself to other people does me no good. So I sit, paralyzed by fear and loathing, and wishing that I had gone into something more sensible, like accounting. But would I be happy? I doubt it. I do, after all, hate math. But it's not as though I'm all that happy right now, either. I just don't know who it is I've become, but I know I don't like me very much. And that's a scary place to be.

I wish I were young again and could just climb up into my mother's lap.

"O Great God, be small enough to hear me now." ~Nichole Nordeman

Imagine my surprise when I hit rock bottom, only to find Him there.

"From the ends of the earth I call to you, I call as my heart grows faint; lead me to the rock that is higher than I." ~Psalm 61:2

Rated

There's a website called http://www.ratemyprofessors.com that allows students to rate their professors based on their degree of easyness, their clarity, their helpfulness, and even their appearance (you can add a hot tomale if you think the professor is "hot"). I've been on there before to see if any of the professors I'm going to have next semester have been rated, and it's pretty funny reading some of the comments. (And FYI, Union people-Union's on there, too.) Anyway, the site has a list of the top 20 funniest comments about professors, and it's too hilarious not to share. What is your favorite one? I think I like numbers 16, 8, 5, and 1 the best. (I so hope I never end up on this site.)

20 You can't cheat in her class because no one knows the answers.
19 His class was like milk, it was good for 2 weeks.
18 Houston, we have a problem. Space cadet of a teacher, isn't quite attached to earth.
17 I would have been better off using the tuition money to heat my apartment last winter.
16 Three of my friends got A's in his class and my friends are dumb.
15 Emotional scarring may fade away, but that big fat F on your transcript won't.
14 Evil computer science teaching robot who crushes humans for pleasure.
13 Miserable professor - I wish I could sum him up without foul language.
12 Instant amnesia walking into this class. I swear he breathes sleeping gas.
11 BORING! But I learned there are 137 tiles on the ceiling.
10 Not only is the book a better teacher, it also has a better personality.
9 Teaches well, invites questions and then insults you for 20 minutes.
8 This teacher was a firecracker in a pond of slithery tadpoles.
7 I learned how to hate a language I already know.
6 Very good course, because I only went to one class.
5 He will destroy you like an academic ninja.
4 Bring a pillow.
3 Your pillow will need a pillow.
2 If I was tested on her family, I would have gotten an A.
1 She hates you already.

In other news, I think Oprah controls the news content here in Knoxville. It seems like whatever topic is being discussed on Oprah ends up on the news that comes on after the show. For example, on Monday the show was about crystal meth addicts and the news did a segment on local meth labs. Then today the show is about pornography addiction (and gospel singer Kirk Franklin is a guest talking very frankly about his own struggle), and the news advertised their own story about the disastrous effects of pornography addiction on families. And this is not the first time I've noticed this. Is this a local phenomenon, or have other people picked up on this trend?

I watched the finale of The Biggest Loser tonight since there was no "fresh" episode of Gilmore Girls, and I wish I had watched more of the show before. It was really really amazing to see the transformations these people underwent. Some of them lost over 100 pounds. That's a small person, for crying out loud! I wish I could just watch it every day so then maybe I would be inspired to do something about my own weight problem. But as it is, I'm just a fat girl who can't seem to think she's worth the effort it would take to lose that weight.

I'm hopeless.

A traveshamockery of epic proportions

Okay, kids, get comfy. It's time to vent.

Today in my research class aka the Class From Down Under (and I don't mean Australia), my professor called our attention to a new project underway by the cell phone company Dot Mobile. Apparently, the company is condensing the great literary classics into short text messages that students can download for studying. They are launching the project in January and plan to have all of Shakespeare's works complete by April. So basically Hamlet boils down to "2B or NT2B?=???" and Romeo and Juliet becomes "Romeo, Romeo--wher4 Rt thou Romeo?" The beautiful complexity of Paradise Lost is reduced to "devl kikd outa hevn coz jelus of jesus&strts war." Forget that these little messages really serve no study purpose since they don't even capture all of the plot points or aid in the comprehension of the finer points of the work. Forget that they couldn't possibly help a student understand Hamlet's soliloquies even if they know one little line.

What really irks me about this is that such a project takes a literary classic and strips it of the very thing that makes it such--its "literariness." There is no literary quality in a text message. You can't appreciate the theological nuances of Paradise Lost or Divine Comedy by reading a text message. You can't appreciate the artful quality of a well-placed Shakespearean pun in a text message. And even simplifying Hamlet to a mere plot summary does nothing, for any student of literature knows that Shakespeare ripped off most of his plots from other people. What makes Shakespeare great is not the stories; it's the way he tells the stories. It's their literariness.

What Dot mobile is doing is giving students yet another excuse not to read. As if they need any more. And what's worse--they've had a professor consulting with them on the writing of these text messages. I just can't even begin to understand that. So I beg you, go and read a book! A real book! (If you want suggestions, I'd be happy to supply them.) Put down your Cliffs Notes, don't go to SparkNotes, go to the real source and eat it up, every last morsel. Will that take time? Duh. But all things worth doing take time. That's part of what makes it worthwhile. A text message? With the push of button, you can delete it and it's gone. Literature? Literature is forever.

If you want to read about this, click here. And a Google search of dot mobile will pull up other results as well.

I hate doing school work on a break. And on Saturday night, no less. I have no life. One of my dear friends, however, had a sweet little baby girl on Thanksgiving Day. Welcome to the world, Bethany Kathleen!

ETA: You know what I don't understand? HoW dO PeOPle tYpE lIKe thIs? It tAkEs WaY LoNGer tHaN tYpING noRmaLlY. Plus, it's annoying. Can anyone explain this phenomenon to me?

In case any of you were waiting with bated breath to see if I would get up at the crack of dawn to go shopping, I thought I'd update. I did in fact wake up at 5 am, and my dad and I set out for Target. And of course everyone else in Bartlett was there, too, which explains the line that was snaking all the way around the side of the building when we got there a little before 6. My dad and I had a plan, though, so we split up, with him going for a tree in the Christmas area and me heading for the electronics. He definitely had the sweeter end of the deal, let me tell you. Everyone was in the electronics department, and I do mean everyone. (I think I may have even seen George W. checking out the PS2 games.) So I grabbed the digital camera I was going for, and proceeded to spend about 15 minutes just trying to get out of that area. It was crazy and chaotic, but oddly entertaining. I'm weird, what can I say? Dad and I met up in the Christmas area, where he was holding my very first Christmas tree! They had little 6.5 ft. prelit trees on sale for $29.99, so I got one, along with some red and silver ornaments to put on it. I am so excited about going back to the apartment in Knoxville and decorating my tree! Liz and I can have a tree decorating party! I am so excited! (I know I already said that, but really, I am so excited!) I love the Christmas season!

And in other news, it seems that I can't in fact hate the new Pride and Prejudice forever. It in no way will replace the position that the A&E miniseries holds in my heart, but it was really very good in its own right. The ending was actually superior, I thought. (Don't hate me, Jessica and Kathleen!) The ending was completely not based on the book or the other movie, but it just made me sigh with happiness, and I love the character of Mr. Darcy. (The actor in this movie is not Colin Firth, but he did a wonderful job.) The dialogue was almost identical in several scenes, and the pace of the dialogue rivals that of Gilmore Girls. Naturally the events were very compressed, and I think in some instances more detail would have helped, but I was very pleased overall. The only true complaint I have is that the actor who played Mr. Bingley was not as good as the one in the A&E version (nor as cute, if I may be superficial), and the way Mr. Bingley was portrayed in this version made him seem a little too vapid. There was also this one particular servant in the Bennet house who just randomly appeared in scenes humming to herself, and I thought it was really annoying and pointless. (Does anyone remember that being in the book? I don't.) I have to say I really wanted to hate this movie, and I still don't know why anyone felt that there needed to be another version of this beloved book, but I recommend seeing it nevertheless.

Anyway, that's all for now folks! Have a lovely weekend!

ETA: Looks like this will be Alias's last season. Apparently ratings have greatly decreased this season. I wonder if that could be because they killed off one of the major characters? Nah.

I think my family may have the briefest Thanksgiving celebration of anyone. My grandparents came over at 11, we ate a little after 12, and they left by 2:15! Later this afternoon my mom and I are going to go see Pride and Prejudice so I can finally decide if I should hate it forever. And then tomorrow my dad and I are toying with the idea of going shopping early in the morning. We'll see if that actually happens, though. I do love my sleep.

I thought since it's Thanksgiving and all I would extend a most hearty "Thank you!" to all of my subscribers. Thanks for reading my various and sundry thoughts on life, love and other mysteries. (A little POG shoutout for you, Brennan!) I am thankful for my little xanga community.

I'm also thankful for: grace, Jesus's death and resurrection, my amazing parents and my goofy brother, my marvelous friends who let me call them at 2 am if I need to, Gilmore Girls, Everwood, books (new and old), good hot chocolate, a glowing fire, down blankets, my iPod mini (aka Cotton Candy), music in general, the ability to sing somewhat decently, my guitar (aka Tocame), my movie collection, my years at Union, my professors at Union (most of them, anyway, haha), my assistantship to UT, my apartment in Knoxville, my roomie in Knoxville (hi Elizabeth!), my car, Starbucks caramel apple cider, my neurotic dog Sandy, Diet Coke, my Instant Messenger friends (all 3 of you, haha), etc. etc. There's so much to be thankful for. How blessed we all are! I challenge each of you to remember to give freely what has been freely given to you. Enjoy the holiday!

This week on Gilmore Girls...

Rory and Lorelai open the episode with banter that seems terribly forced and contrived, and again I think that they made up far too easily. Rory is introduced to Paul Anka, who only lets Rory into his crazy psychotic universe after Rory puts sugar on her toes for Paul Anka to lick off. (Yes, that is really what happened.) Lorelai then gives Rory a hatbox full of post-it notes with things Lorelai thought of while they were apart and wanted to remember for when they made up. (Apparently Kirk went skeet shooting. Then took up tai chi. Babette recorded her cats meowing and made a record. Lorelai tried reading Beowulf then quickly gave up. You know, the usual.)

The gals make their way to the diner and enter Luke's to the fanfare of Lorelai's poor imitation of a drumroll. There's an uncomfortable exchange between Rory and Luke where Rory asks Luke if anything's new with him, and you can practically hear Luke's guilty conscience screaming out his little secret. Hep Alien (Lane's band) has this big shot with some record label dudes at a gig, and Rory promises to attend and film it all. After that Rory informs Lorelai that she and Logan aren't talking but doesn't go into the dirty details.

Then comes one of the best scenes in the episode. Lorelai brings Rory to the inn, where Sookie literally hyperventilates when she finds out that the estranged pair are now un-estranged. Michel comes in and says "Rory!" in an uncharacteristically enthusiastic but nevertheless cute voice, then tries to cover it up. I love Michel.

Cut to the band, who is going over their set list for the big gig. All of the band's songs are named after girls, and Lane suggests that it would be nice if Zach wrote one about a girl named Lane since they're dating and all, but Zach says her name's not good for a song, only cliches rhyme with Lane (like rain and pain), and Brian's all, "But you could totally write a good song about Lane." Zach remains unconvinced; Lane looks vaguely disappointed. The anvil of foreshadowing falls with a loud bang.

Rory and Lorelai at the inn. Lorelai tells Rory about Chris's unexpected phone call, and the girls speculate about what the "good news" could be. Lorelai decides to call up Chris and meet up with him. They meet up in some random restaurant, exchange this weird hug filled with the awkwardness of a year's worth of separation (brought on by incredible stupidity on Chris's part, but do they talk about it? Of course not! That would be communicating, and no one on this show does that!). Anyway, Christopher's rich grandfather died and apparently left him enough money to buy 10 Third World countries, and he wants to share the wealth with Rory and Lorelai. Lorelai of course refuses the money but promises to talk to Rory about it to see if she might want something.

Liz drops into the episode from the "we need another subplot" bag, and she's at Luke's trying to prepare her Thanksgiving meal for 12, even though she's completely devoid of any culinary skills and Luke ends up doing some of it for her. When she runs upstairs to check on her other food (that turns out to be mostly ruined), Luke follows her and spills his guts about the kid. Why in the world he thought it would be a good idea to tell his blabbermouth sister about it before Lorelai is beyond me, but hey, they've gotta create drama. Liz immediately guesses who the mother is since Luke's a "serial monogamist" and then asks what he's going to do about it. He says he's not sure since Anna hasn't contacted him about it, April seemed completely unconcerned, so he feels like if they want to forget about it then he can to. Riiight, Luke, right. Irresponsibility is so not your forte. Liz is kind of like, "Are you sure about this?" but doesn't press the issue, which in my opinion was a bad call.

We then return to the band, who is doing a sound check before their big gig. Zach's got his guitar in a wad because Brian has been working on a song about Lane, but instead of dealing with his jealousy, he turns on the jerk button--he just snaps at everyone, throws out the set list, causes a huge scene, and it ends with Gil tackling Zach on the stage while everyone boos. So then Lane goes to find Zach after this debacle and she wants to know what's wrong, starts crying because he let her and the band down, he says that maybe people in a band shouldn't date, they kind of break up (I think), and that's it. Seriously people, communicate!

This is getting way too long (sorry!) so I'll try to wrap it up. Rory decides to ask Christopher to pay for the rest of Yale, and so of course this will cause major issues with the grandparents, whom Rory wants to be rid of. A ton of people converge on the Dragonfly for Thanksgiving, during which Luke surreptitiously calls Anna, but hangs up when he just gets their answering machine. He has the perfect opportunity to tell Lorelai about April when she tells him what Chris was calling about and that Rory's going to take the money to pay for Yale, but does he tell her? Noooo. Because that would be too easy. And then what would they write about? During dinner Rory gets a call on her cell phone, and guess who it is? Not Logan, but his sister Honor. She's calling from the awful Huntzberger dinner to tell Rory that Logan's an idiot and she's sorry to hear they broke up. This is clearly news to Rory, who thought they had just had a fight, but Honor said Logan told her they broke up. Rory goes back to the table in shock, the chefs bring out 80 turkeys and a gazillion pounds of cranberry sauce, and the end.

This wasn't completely in order, but I tried to group the individual storylines together. And I read somewhere that the next new episode isn't until January 10! So this blah episode is what we have to mull over until then?? What's happened to my show??? I hope Rory and Logan stay broken up, Luke better tell Lorelai about April or I'm gonna get violent, and World War III is going to break out when Emily and Richard find out that Christopher's paying for Yale. Drama, thy name is Gilmore Girls.

Less than twenty-four hours from now I'll be on my way home! I have one class tomorrow from 11:10-12:05, and then it's Memphis here I come! I'm not gonna lie, I'm completely excited. I don't think I ever used to get this excited about going home when I was at Union, and I guess that's due to the fact that then I was an only an hour away so it was much easier to go home. And plus at Union I felt more like myself, so I didn't want to go home a lot anyway. But bottom line: I'm really looking forward to going home and seeing my family. And my brother apparently has an awesome tattoo on his back now, so I'm looking forward to checking that out. If I wasn't completely terrified of the pain, I would consider getting a tattoo, but I'm a big wimp so I don't think it'll ever happen. And then there's the fact that it's permanent. Knowing me, I'd get something dumb like "I love Gilmore Girls" and then in ten years wonder what in the world I was thinking. So no tattoos for me! (And really, who am I kidding? Can anyone really see me with a tattoo? Probably not.)

Anyway, I'm off to try and do some work before tonight's "fresh" episode of Gilmore Girls. I wish they would quit calling them "fresh" episodes. It's not like fruit or clean laundry, people. It's TV.

A Brief Update

Waking up at 9 when you need to leave for school at 8:30=bad. (But it's fortunate that the leaving at 8:30 is more of an arbitrary, obsessive thing on my part and not a necessity. I don't have class until 10:10, but I like to get there early so I don't have to walk a mile and so I can get a little work done. This morning I did well to brush my teeth and wear clean clothes. Sigh.)

I've decided that alarm clocks are an ineffective means of waking me up. I have 3, and they don't do the job so well. What's an exhausted, stressed grad student to do?

I've decided that I'm stupid. Really. How come everyone else in grad school can think of intelligent questions to ask or smart things to say and I just sit there wondering what in the world is going on half the time?

In other news, I think I may have found a church. Two successful visits in a row=promising. Let us hope for more of the same. And lo and behold, exegetical preaching is not dead. Praise the Lord! Seriously, praise Him! For everything.

ETA: Christmas music=happiness.

Yesterday was a good day! I saw Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire, which didn't disappoint. It was definitely different in tone from the previous ones, no doubt due to the change in director, but it was a nice change. Also definitely darker, both in terms of plot and cinematography, but there was still quite a bit of the humor that you find in the books. Of course they left out a lot of stuff, but that's to be expected when you're dealing with a massive tome like HP 4. I am still deciding my final feelings, but I can tentatively say that it might be the best yet. (I do still miss the old Dumbledore--Richard Harris--though. Michael Gambon isn't the same. And the actors who played Krum and Cho Chang left much to be desired, but oh well.)

Then after that I went to a play at UT with Sheena and Katie. Our friend Dustin was in it, and he was fantastic (especially compared to some of the other actors), and then we went to IHOP, which I haven't been to in forever. I had the stuffed french toast combo, and it was seriously one of the best things I've ever eaten. Seriously, you must try it if you go to IHOP.

On today's agenda: a marathon viewing of the real Pride and Prejudice, the A&E miniseries (for a truly inspired commentary on this version, go to Jessica's Xanga.) I'm going over to Sheena and Katie's later this afternoon, and we're going to watch all five hours of it. They haven't seen it, which is a true travesty, but they have seen the new one, so I'm interested to see how the A&E version measures up for them. I don't care how great the reviews are, Kiera Knightley as Elizabeth Bennet is just wrong!

I Know They Didn't!

WARNING: This entire post will be dedicated to Gilmore Girls, so if you couldn't care less about the show, leave now. (Although really you should rethink your priorities.) And if you didn't watch last night's episode but intend to, don't read any further.





Okay, now onto the main event--last night's episode. The big bombshell first. Luke has a daughter. A daughter. What in the world is happening to my show?! Last time I checked, I wasn't watching Days of Our Lives, but this is so a plot they would do! Granted, the way we found out about it was unique but I just can't accept this as a good direction for the show to go in. Even though I knew it was coming because I read everything about the show I can find, I was still secretly hoping that all of my sources were wrong about this, but they weren't. So I'm going with denial. I don't believe April is really Luke's daughter. After all, the girl is 12. Couldn't she have messed up the results? And why haven't we heard of this Anna woman before? When Rachel was brought up in season one, it was implied that she was one of Luke's only serious relationships, if not the only one. But now Anna? Seems far too convenient for my tastes.

And Rory. I get that Jess woke her up from her apathetic stupor and she was motivated to get a job and change her circumstances, but her behavior in that newspaper office was absurd. Maybe it's just me, but I think it's completely unprofessional to harass an editor day after day after he was nice enough to give you a good reference but informed you he doesn't have any openings. But what irks me even more is that her nutty behavior was actually rewarded. Can't something just be a little bit difficult for her for once? I mean, why couldn't we have seen her looking around, going to interviews or something? Why did we instead get to watch her practically get on her hands and knees and beg for this job, when she probably could have found one somewhere else? (Someone did call the Dragonfly about a reference, after all.)

I was absolutely thrilled that Lorelai and Rory reconciled, but it seemed to me that it all was a little too easy. Here's what the dialogue could have been:

Rory: Hey Mom!
Lorelai: Hey Rory! Long time no talk!
Rory: Yeah, well, you know, I've been busy being an Emily clone. But guess what? I got a job! And I'm going back to Yale! Even though it's the end of the semester! And I'm going to find my own place to live! Can I come over?
Lorelai: Of course you can! Let's just put all that baggage behind us and hug in the front yard!
Rory: Okay, here I come!

I mean, seriously. It was that fast and that easy. Rory did apologize and say she'd "messed up," but I was expecting a little more than that, I guess.

Anyway, the episode was really good in that stuff actually happened (as compared to other episodes this season where the most exciting thing is a $5,000 purse), but I'm really nervous about where things are heading with the Luke/Lorelai/daughter angle. And now Christopher's going to reappear as well! Why must they keep playing the Christopher card? Good grief! Missing: one favorite show. Gilmore Girls, come back!

Thanks for indulging me in my rant. For someone else's viewpoint, you can go here. Also, I'm considering putting all of my TV-related blogs on my old blogspot account. That way people can just go there for that if they want and those who don't care about that stuff won't have to read it. What do people think? Would anyone go read the other blog? I'd post any news about Gilmore Girls and other shows that interest me, and provide weekly commentary on GG and Everwood. Tell me what you think!

Treasure in a Binding

Today I held treasure. Treasure in the form of a first edition copy of Sense and Sensibility and then in the form of a copy of the Vulgate printed in 1554. I wish you could have seen the detail in the Vulgate--the illuminated initial caps and the delicate script. It was absolutely wondrous. And then I got to peer at a 15th century manuscript of the Latin Psalter which had some incredibly intricate designs. I love books, and I've got to tell you, they just don't make them like they used to.

And I've also got to tell you I'm incredibly excited about this movie. Four days!

EDIT: And if anyone wants to get me a Christmas present (and I know you all do), I really really really want this book. I'm such a nerd. Isn't it great?

The Gilmore Girls Forum is back! I realize this information may be of no consequence to anyone else, but in case it is, I'm sharing it. Plus, my life is composed of small pleasures, and posting on this forum used to be one of them until hackers crashed the system back in the spring. The first time it happened the forum was back up pretty quickly, but then the hackers struck again. I don't know who would care about destroying a fan forum, especially one devoted to Gilmore Girls, but the world is full of sick people. Anyway, for months I checked the parent site for information, but all they could tell me was that the forum was down, they were looking into ways to protect it better, and they didn't know when it would be up again. So I despaired and quit checking the site as often. And then earlier today I was feeling hopeful, so I went to the site, and lo and behold--the forum was restored last month! I can't tell you how excited I was, but try and picture it if you can. I had tried going to other forums, but it wasn't the same since I'd come to know certain members of the other one, and it was just so much better.

I'm so happy! It's like I've found my long-lost friends! (And you can all quit judging me in your heads. We all have our idiosyncrasies. I'm just very open about mine.)

My new colors are in honor of the Vols, who broke their four-game losing streak, beating the Tigers 20-16! Good ole Rocky Top! Elizabeth and I were actually there for this momentous occasion, and on the first row on the fifty-yard line, no less. It was a great first game experience for me, even though when we left at the end of the 3rd quarter the Vols were down by 3. (We were kind of bored and VERY hungry.) There is definitely something intoxicating about seeing this sea of orange fans, and I couldn't help but get caught up in it all.

Last night I was reunited with a dear friend. Kerri was one of my really good friends during high school, but as college progressed we lost touch. We got back into touch in the spring when she invited me to her wedding shower and wedding, and we had a good time catching up. At the time, I thought that was that. Then the other weekend when my mom came to see me, who should we run into at the mall but Kerri? Turns out she and her husband live in Knoxville! Brad goes to the law school, and Kerri teaches fourth grade. They had me over to their house last night for a yummy home-cooked meal, where I also met Brad's sister. We had a great time talking and laughing, and then we went to the discount theater (of whose existence I was woefully unaware until then) and saw Fantastic Four, which was more entertaining than I thought it would be. I love it when you're able to pick up with a friend right where you left off, and that is how it was with Kerri. I think there will be other good times in our future.

That's all on my front. School continues to be completely draining. Only three weeks left, which is both exciting and terrifying.

I'm (not so) Famous!

Dear readers, humor me for a moment and let me share what I deem to be exciting news. (Keep in mind that my threshold for excitement is very low, as I spend most of my time reading boring stuff, so even the wind blowing is exciting.) Anyway, the following is an excerpt from this week's AskAusiello column, an online column on TVGuide's website that deals with all the latest scoop on several different shows:

Question: Please tell me someone (SPOILER) isn't really going to die on Everwood (Ask Ausiello 11/2)! I'm so crushed about that! How "major" a character are we talking? — Erin

Ausiello: Major enough to coax Greg Berlanti back into the fold.

Guess who that Erin is? Me!!! I read Ausiello's column every week, since I am a professed addict of Gilmore Girls and want to read everything I can get my hands on concerning the show, including spoilers. Anyway, Ausiello is a huge Gilmore fan who actually made a cameo appearance on the show last season, and so not too long ago I made it my personal goal to get a question in his column. Since then I have emailed Ausiello faithfully every week with different questions, but to no avail. Last week, I decided to change my tactic. His recent favorite show has been Everwood, which I also happen to love, so I thought maybe if I asked a question about a HUGE (or as The Donald says it, YOOGE) spoiler he'd revealed the previous week I would have a better chance of getting in the column. Plus, not as many people ask about Everwood as Gilmore Girls. And sure enough, when I read the latest column, there was my question buried halfway down! This probably interests no one but me, but I just had to share. (And really, if you're a fan of shows like Lost, Alias, Everwood, CSI, and of course GG, among others, you should check out the column! But only if you don't mind being spoiled every once in a while!)

Side note: in case you don't know what a spoiler is, it's any info about a show that comes out before the episode with said info airs. For a good example of a spoiler site, go here.

It's a Hard-Knock Life

I had hoped grad school would be the end of having to do useless assignments, a.k.a busy work, but nooooo. I find myself confronted with them all the time in one of my classes. I am currently trying to find out what England copyright law was like in 1720, who wrote a review of Coleridge's Christabel in 1816, or where the manuscript for the Civil War diary of Mary Chestnut is housed. These queries (and they are just a few of many) are supposed to teach me how to research, and I have become quite familiar with practically every database known to man (or at least those relevant to work in English studies), but I cannot find the answers to any of these infernal questions. I've spent at least five hours here and there on this one assignment, to no avail. If this is what it means to be a professor (and I really really really hope it's not), then forget it. I'm going to work at Sea World.

Proud (?) to be a Vol

According to one of the ads on facebook, Playboy has ranked UT as one of the nation's top 10 party schools. Even better, they're currently on campus through Nov. 9 looking for girls to pose. I've never been so proud to be a Vol. (I wish there were some sort of sarcasm indicator, kind of like a bold or underline feature or something, but then again I guess part of the point of sarcasm is that it's more subtle.)

In other news, the latter part of this semester is both creeping by and slamming into me full force. How can that be?

Random tidbits:
1. I just got The Riverside Chaucer, brand new, for $40 on ebay (note how much it costs on Amazon). I'm not gonna lie, I'm totally jazzed. (Are the kids still saying "jazzed" these days? Were they ever? If I'm saying it, probably not.) I was even more jazzed by the fact that a class I'm taking next semester requires it, so I had a legitimate reason to buy it.

2. It's way too warm here to be November. If we're having to run the air conditioner in our apartment in November, there's a problem.

3. You know you're a college/grad student when the closest you come to cooking a "real" meal is Hamburger Helper. And you like it.

4. I love how all of the trees seemed to change color at the same time. It's positively magical. Isn't God a genius? Seriously.

(I had the weirdest urge to end this entry with "And then I found $5." What's going on??)

To Be Young Again

Tonight me and some friends went and saw Chicken Little. In 3-D. To steal a phrase from Rachel, I'm not gonna lie; it was fun times. For an hour and a half, I felt like a little kid again. It was great. I recommend the movie to anyone who just wants to soak in some goofiness and finds the idea of animated characters singing a karaoke version of a Spice Girls song appealing. (That last part is really in there, I promise.) And before you mock me for going to a "kid" movie, we were not the only adults in there sans children. Cartoons are cool, my friends.

Autumn

From the porch bathed in soft twilight,
I catch a glimpse of a sliver
of a moon in a rainbow-hued sky
and the stark outline of trees bereft of leaves
that casts long, interwoven shadows
upon the lawn littered with the lingering
remnants of summer. I marvel
at the quiet music of the stars
twinkling to a secret silent rhythm,
content in their single purpose.
They are unaware of the fear and vastness
of the huge unknown that looms
above and before me,
and in the serenity of falling night
I am undone.

Overcomer

You've had control of me too long. It's time for you to leave. I'm through with the negativity, the lies, the constant assaults. I'm through feeling like I'm worthless, through feeling sorry for myself, through believing that I'm a failure. I can't keep waking up every morning wish I hadn't. I can't keep questioning every move I make, wondering if it's the right one. I can't keep looking in the mirror and hating the reflection I see. I can't keep doubting my faith, doubting myself, doubting God. That's just what you want me to do. You taunt me and tempt me, whispering seductive lies and distracting me with my own insufficiency.

But no more. The power you had over me is gone. I will not bow down. I will not yield. I am a daughter of the Most High God, and He bought me with the blood of His Son. I am fearfully and wonderfully made, and it is for freedom that I have been set free. So I stand firm. I will not be burdened again by the yoke of slavery, of sin. I demolish all arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the word of God. I take captive every thought and make it obedient to Christ. I cast my cares on the LORD, for He cares for me. He LOVES me, desires me, calls to me to come out of the darkness and into the light. He showers upon me blessing upon blessing, mercies that are new every morning, grace that can't be measured. He is from all things, in all things, and by Him all things were created. My flesh and my heart may fail, my life may dwindle to a vapor, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever. He is my light and my salvation, so I will fear you no more, for there is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out all fear. Through Him I have in my possession the very power He used to raise Christ from the dead. Through Him I have the victory. Through Him you are defeated.

Get behind me, satan. You are welcome here no longer.

I am posting what is going to be my last survey. I know I'm wildly popular and everyone loves to "tag" me for these things, but I'm all surveyed out. (I'll pretend I'm wildly popular rather than just assuming that everyone tags me b/c I'm either a) a pushover who will do whatever people want, or b) a xanga addict who will most assuredly read everyone's subscriptions and be prompt to respond, or c) all of the above.) I do of course reserve the right to change my mind at any time and post surveys every day for a week if I so choose, but don't hold your breath.

Three Names You Go By
1. Erin
2. Hetzel
3. Pretzel (I don't really go by this, but when I meet new people they think it's so funny to call me this.)

Three Parts of Your Heritage
1. German
2. Latin American (Salvadoran, to be specific)
3. Irish

Three Things That Scare You
1. Failure
2. the Unknown
3. Walking to my car at night

Three of Your Everyday Essentials
1. Lip Smackers
2. Colored pens
3. Car

Three Things You Are Wearing Right Now
1. A hoodie
2. Totally trendy ankle socks
3. My newest pair of jeans

Three of Your Favorite Bands or Musical Artists:
1. Caedmon's Call
2. Switchfoot
3. Nichole Nordeman

Three of Your Favorite Songs - at the moment (this is so hard-I have a bazillion favorites!)
1. "Reflecting Light" by Sam Phillips (for you Gilmore Girls junkies, this is the song that Luke and Lorelai danced to on their first "date")
2. "Life is Wonderful" by Jason Mraz
3. "My Love Hasn't Grown Cold" by Bethany Dillon

Three Things You Want in a Relationship (other than Real Love)
1. Laughter
2. Hugs
3. Trust

Three Physical Things about the Opposite Sex that Appeal to You
1. Smile
2. Eyes
3. Dark hair

Three of Your Favorite Hobbies
1. Reading
2. Gilmore Girls (as much as I love it, it's a hobby)
3. Writing

Three Things You Want to do Really Badly Right Now
1. Have some Marble Slab
2. Dance with someone under the moonlight
3. Laugh with Emily Vassar (I miss you, Em!)

Three Places You Want to go on Vacation
1. Italy--all of it
2. New York City
3. Chicago

Three Things You Want to Do Before You Die
1. Sky dive
2. Write a novel
3. Get my PhD (please, Lord)

Three Ways that you are stereotypically a Chick/Guy
1. Cheesy commercials can make me cry.
2. I give my heart away too easily.
3. I feel prettier with makeup on.

Three of Your Favorite Cities/Towns
1. Seattle
2. Jackson, TN (seriously)
3. Chattanooga

Reason #237 why I hate visiting churches: the "meet and greet" portion of the service. You know, that time during the music when the pastor or music minister encourages you to "find 5 or 6 people and shake their hands and tell them you love them." This is very uncomfortable if you're a visitor, especially when you turn around to greet the person behind you and they are all very busy shaking each other's hands and catching up on the antics of little Billy and Susan. Especially when you've never met these people and feel rather awkward about professing love to them so you just kind of mumble something incoherent. Especially when you're sitting in a row by yourself and end up just sort of standing there all bereft while everyone else is hugging and laughing. And especially when the one person who finally comes up to you asks you if you're single. Seriously. Since when is it a good idea to ask about that right when you meet someone? It's bad enough that my relatives ask me every time I see them, but at least they're related to me so in theory they have more of a "right" to ask me than a complete stranger. (Even though I still say it's none of their business, and trust me, if I'm dating someone, the whole world's gonna know about it eventually.) Anyway, all of this discomfort certainly has motivated me to be more understanding and compassionate towards visitors, should the day come when I finally do find a church to call home and can then focus on welcoming other people.

And I decided not to go back to this particular church, although my reason for not returning has very little to do with the meet and greet. My real beef is this: topical preaching. Or rather, bad topical preaching. I'm not completely against topical preaching although I do prefer a more exegetical approach, but when it's so scattered I can't make sense of it or it has nothing to do with the Scripture presented as the main focus, I have a problem with that. Yesterday's message was part of a series the pastor has been doing about community and spiritual growth, and this message was called "How Can We Help Each Other Grow?" Well, I had a particular interest in what he had to say about this due to some discussion that's occurred on another friend's xanga, but what followed was not about growth at all but about making everyone else feel good. In order to grow, we should make everyone feel accepted, appreciated, loved, and affirmed (they all started with the letter a per typical preaching alliteration, but affectioned isn't really a word, so loved it is). Now, I'm not saying these are bad ideas (they're very positive, necessary things), but I'm not so sure of the connection between these things and spiritual growth, and the pastor didn't clear it up for me at all. Most of his supporting comments dealt with child-rearing and being a good friend. And you know what Scripture he had underneath the title of his message? Romans 8:28-29, which says, "For we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love God, who are called according to his purpose. For those he foreknew, he also predestined to become conformed to the likeness of his Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brothers." Beyond reading it, stating that these were his life's verses, and saying that this is why we should grow spiritually, he did nothing else with them. Each of his points had other Scripture attached to them, and they had little relevance to his message.

I know I'm being very critical, and if this were an isolated occurrence I'd be more inclined to let it slide, but it's not. I've been confronted with it at practically every church I've visited since I've been in Knoxville. Does no one care about just talking about what the Bible says? Why does everything have to become a how-to list? God's Word is sufficient in and of itself; it doesn't need to be "dressed up" or manipulated to help someone support the ideas they want to get out of it. I would much prefer an in-depth look at those verses in Romans in their context and just as they are than hear a scattered message that dealt very little with Biblical truths. It seems to me that a message should be shaped around Scripture and not the other way around. Is that too much to ask? I don't think so, but it seems very hard to come by. Here it is almost November and still I haven't really found a promising church home. I know God will provide, though, so keep looking I must! I'd appreciate others' thoughts on this!

I have the best mom in the world.

I talked to her late on Friday night (or rather, I bawled into the phone while she tried to calm me down), and Saturday morning she left Memphis at 7:45 and drove 5 1/2 hours to see me. I had no idea she was coming; she just called while she was on the road and told me she was on her way. She said there was no way she could have me upset and not be there. She got into Knoxville around 2, and we went to the mall, then to see Dreamer (which was very sweet and made me like horses even though they've always kind of scared me), and then to Wal-Mart where she hooked me up with some necessities, and then to Ruby Tuesday for a late dinner and gab-fest. It was so so so so wonderful to see her, and it made everything that's been wrong in my life lately seem a little more...not wrong. She left this morning after we ate breakfast, and it was a quick visit, but exactly what I needed. So it's official: you're never too old to need your mom. I'm living proof.

EDIT: I just saw an advertisement for a CBS miniseries entitled Category 7: End of the World. Is it just me or is this a gross exploitation of the events of the past few months? Are they trying to make something so completely ridiculous in the hopes that people will be able to forget about the real tragedies? Is there nothing off-limits?

And on tomorrow's edition of Erin's xanga: reason #237 why I hate visiting churches. (Don't misunderstand me: I don't hate church; I hate visiting churches.)

Today I had no classes, and tomorrow I don't either! I did, however, have to attend an eight-hour training seminar that's required for the technology grant I got. It wasn't bad, actually. We're receiving some useful tips and guidelines for when we start designing our module, and we had a lot of time to plan out some of the content and the types of mulitmedia we'll need to use. It's going to be a massive amount of work, but it will be really useful and I've wanted to learn more about web design, so this is perfect. Plus, I get paid for it, and today they said that if we meet all of the deadlines/checkpoints, they will add $500 to our overall grant money, which means that my partner and I would each get $1500! I can't even tell you how much I could use that money. It's unfortunate that I won't actually get it until June, but what a happy day that will be! This whole grant thing is a great idea, so if any of you go to graduate school, apply for grants! (And when I'm complaining about this grant thing in Feb., remind me that I once said it was a good thing.) But it's good experience, extra money, and adds to your c.v. Plus, we got catered lunch from Panera today, Moe's for lunch tomorrow, and free books, one of which has the unfortunate title How to Turn Learners On Without Turning Them Off: Ways to Ignite Interest in Learning. I mean really, does sexual language have to be everywhere? Spare me!

And...I was tagged by Stef.
Five Things:

Five things I plan to do before I die:
1.) Visit every continent.
2.) Write a novel or a book of poems.
3.) Get my PhD.
4.) Go snorkeling in the Great Barrier Reef.
5.) Go to Italy.

Five things I can do:
1.) Read fast.
2.) Scare away boys. (I'm not saying I want to do this, it just happens.)
3.) Giggle about nothing.
4.) Giggle about everything.
5.) Spell "a lot" correctly. (Please please please anyone who reads this--it is TWO WORDS!)

Five things I cannot do (that I'd like to be able to do):
1.) Read Old English without having to look up most of the words.
2.) Blow a bubble with my gum. (Isn't that sad?)
3.) Speak fluent Spanish.
4.) Do a cartwheel.
5.) Teach at Union.

Five things that attract me to the opposite sex:
1.) Smile.
2.) Sense of humor.
3.) Compassion.
4.) Kind eyes.
5.) Love for God.

Five things I say most often:
1.) I love ______
2.) What in the world?!
3.) Give me a break!
4.) Oh please.
5.) I'm tired.

Five celebrity crushes:
1.) Colin Firth
2.) Topher Grace
3.) Jason Mraz
4.) Mark Ruffalo
5.) Viggo Mortensen

Anyone have any ideas for a fun, creative, but cheap Halloween costume? Some of the grad students are throwing a Halloween party, and I really couldn't care less about Halloween, but it would be fun to hang out with people. However, I heard that a lot of people dress up, so I don't want to be the one party-pooper who doesn't. Help!

And I just realized today that my semester officially ends on Dec. 9. I only have one final, and it's on that day, so after 12:15, I'm through! It's going to be here before I know it, and it will be such a relief. Maybe I can survive this semester. Here's hoping!

EDIT: I also might be seeing him and him in Nashville that weekend I am through with school. What a way to celebrate!

Also, a private school in New Jersey has forbidden their students to keep blogs! Isn't that a bit over the line? School bans blogging. You can take away my freedom, but don't mess with my blog! (Kidding, people, only kidding!)

I think I'm losing my sense of compassion. I don't care enough about those who don't know Jesus. Maybe because my own relationship with Him is strained at best right now, and that's certainly not His fault. As hinted at in my poem in my last (neglected) post, I feel like I'm changing into this person I don't know and don't exactly like--someone who is apathetic and thoughtless and not at all concerned by the fact that she can go a week without talking to Jesus and only feel slightly bad about it. Well, I am a little concerned since I'm thinking about it, but I can't seem to move past that, and I don't know what my problem is except that it seems like the things I used to care about I don't care about as much anymore. I'm scared.

Night

I read somewhere that a new moon
and dark skies make a great night
to spot comets. I didn't come here
for that. I got in my car and drove,
no destination in mind, only the thought
that I had to leave, had to put distance
between me and the self I left behind,
the self I have become but am wanting to lose.

When life presses down too hard upon me,
I drive. There is comfort in the smooth
coolness of the wheel beneath my hands,
the road stretched out in a limitless
expanse, and in those moments
I dare to hope that there is more than this
life I am half-living, this life I am barely surviving.
The feeling may vanish after a moment,
but it will have to be
enough.

EDIT: I have a new addiction: Sudoku

Well, I'm 24. It feels just like 23. Except maybe not. Dare I imagine what God might have in store for me this year?

I got my first birthday card today (thank you, Steven)! I also got a bulletin from that church I visited. I guess since I wasn't there on Sunday they sent me that instead? They sure are thorough! I also got a package from my mom, but I am going to try and exercise all of my willpower and not open it until tomorrow. We'll see how long I hold out.

Tonight the birthday celebration officially begins. I am going to eat at P.F. Chang's for dinner with Elizabeth and 6 girls from the English department, and then we are going to head down to the strip to hear some band play. I love P.F. Chang's, and I'm always up for some live music, so it should be fun. And it's nice to feel like I kind of sort of might have some friends. :) Then tomorrow I plan on making a little visit to my friend Barnes & Noble (I've neglected her of late) and then Saturday night I'm going to see a play on campus with a couple of people. It's so weird that I'm going to be 24 tomorrow. I don't feel 24, and just to show how much I am a product of my Southern heritage, I feel as though at 24 I should already have a kid or at least be married or something. Good thing I'm a new generation of woman. Riight. Have a lovely evening, friends!

I passed understanding a long, long time ago
And the simple home of systems and answers we all know
What I thought I wanted, what I got instead
Leaves me broken and somehow peaceful

I keep wanting you to be fair
But that’s not what you said
I want certain answers to these prayers
But that’s not what you said

When I get to heaven I’m gonna go find Job
I want to ask a few hard questions, I want to know what he knows
About what it is he wanted and what he got instead
How to be broken and faithful

Staring in the water like Esops foolish dog
I can’t help but reflect on what it was I almost lost
What it was I wanted, what I got instead
Leaves me broken and grateful

I’m broken and grateful

~Sara Groves, "What I Thought I Wanted"

Isn't it funny how we so often think we know ourselves, only to find out the opposite is true? I used to think I knew who I was and what I wanted, but it seems that more and more my life is nothing but uncertainties. Being a planner and a control freak, this naturally disconcerts me, but when life is uncertain and all I have are questions without answers, I find God in the middle of the mystery. Or do I? I don't often stop "catastrophizing" everything that happens to me long enough to reflect on the presence of God, and this is more true now than ever before. I feel like I used to be introspective and constantly thinking about my relationship with God and how I can seek Him better, but that's not the case anymore. Part of it is fear--fear that introspection will lead me to conclusions I'm not ready to face or areas in my life that need changing. And part of it is a lack of faith--a lack of belief that God will take care of me and love me always. Having faith like a child is no small thing. "O Great God, be small enough to hear me now."

I have homework paralysis. Does anyone have a cure? Seriously, I have a 7-page annotated bibliography due tomorrow, which I'm thinking translates into 17-20 sources, and I've done 2. What is my problem?!

EDIT: I interrupt my non-work to complain about Gilmore Girls. If you couldn't care less about Gilmore Girls, too bad. It's my blog. (Same goes for song choice. You all know you secretly love NSync and know all their dance moves.)

Is it just me or has Gilmore Girls been kind of boring this season? This whole Lorelai/Rory fight has got to end because the show is so devoid of plot I was almost falling asleep tonight! Who cares about changing street names? And who would even think that's actually a plausible idea? And are Luke and Lorelai still engaged because they sure aren't acting like it! We get plenty of chances to see Rory and Logan all lovey-dovey, but all we get of Luke and Lorelai are passionless pecks on the cheek? I'm not saying I want a love fest or anything, but they could at least act like an engaged couple instead of vague acquaintances.

Also, I'm sick and tired of the promos building up some part of the show and then that part coming at the very end of the episode or turning out to be something completely inconsequential. Case in point: Richard's appeal to Lorelai for help with Rory and the "secret" Emily and Richard uncover. The promo makes it look as though the conversation between Richard and Lorelai will be a focus in the episode, but it comes at the end and we don't get to see them talk. And then the big secret Emily and Richard find in Rory's room is the purse that Emily already knew about! It was such a non-event, and it seems that the episodes lately have been nothing but non-events. Granted, Emily's utter evisceration of Shira Huntzberger last week was classic, and overall last week's episode was one of the better ones this season, but it's not enough to excuse the mediocrity of other episodes. Come on, Palladinos, get your act together! End rant.

I care way too much about this show.

So, last night when I got back from Memphis, I checked the mail, anticipating a lot because Elizabeth and I had been gone since Wednesday. And there was a good bit of mail, almost all of it for me, so I was really excited, especially since there were some cards there, and I thought people had actually sent me birthday cards or something (my birthday is Oct. 22, hint hint). No such luck. What I got instead were four, count 'em, FOUR cards from members of a church I had visited the previous Sunday, and they all thanked me for visiting and urged me to come back soon. I had already received a personal visit, two emails, and a phone call, so getting all of these cards was a bit...overwhelming. I don't know whether to be mildly disturbed or encouraged by this. And then I felt bad that I was slightly annoyed by it because really it is a nice gesture and a lot of the other churches I've visited haven't followed up at all. So in all actuality I should be grateful, but instead I was annoyed that there were no birthday cards. I am scum. Selfish, cynical scum, at that. How can Jesus love scum? Sometimes I wonder.

I've had a great break. I've gotten little to zilch work done, but I've also gotten lots of birthday presents, so I'm okay with that. Today I went shopping with my mom, and she bought me lots of cute clothes, and I also have received Crash (yay!), a scarf/gloves/hat combo that is way cute, some pens (I haven't bought pens for myself in ages, and my dear friend Lindsay knows my unhealty addiction to them and supplied me with some fun colored ones), and a mix CD (also from Lindsay) entitled "The Best of the 90's: When You Just Need to be a Preteen Girl." It includes such classics as "Genie in a Bottle," "Bye Bye Bye," "Oops, I Did It Again," and of course, "Oom Bop." Fun times indeed. (I didn't look up the actual spelling of that last song so tell me if it's wrong.)

It was wonderously wonderful to be with my friends for a few days, and hanging out with my family this weekend has also been just what the doctor ordered. My parents, brother, and my 3 grandparents and I all went to dinner tonight at Bahama Breeze, and it was positively scrumptious, and then we came back home and had some of the homemade carrot cake my mom made in honor of my birthday. (Carrot cake is my favorite.) The only thing that stinks about all of these premature presents and celebrations is that my actual birthday is going to be a real snooze fest. What can I do for fun on my actual birthday? Throw a party for myself? Woohoo! I wish all of my friends lived in Knoxville. Oh well. My life is far from awful, so I'll not complain any further. I hope everyone has a lovely Sunday!

P.S. My parents also gave me the fourth season of Gilmore Girls, and it's so great! I'd forgotten a lot of what happened in the fourth season, and I'm thoroughly enjoying the stroll down memory lane.