First, thanks to all of you for your congratulatory comments. They made me happy! :) Second, I got a job (yay!), and I start tomorrow, so blogging may be scarce as I try and figure out my new routine. I'll be with you in spirit, of course.
Now, I have a confession: I am scared to lift weights at the gym. I have done it before, but only if one of the following conditions were met 1)no one else was in the weights area or 2)only women were in the weights area. If neither is met, I don't lift weights. The truth is, seeing a bunch of men over there lifting their 25-pound dumbbells completely intimidates me. I just imagine all of the guys over there smirking at me and my 10-pound or 12-pound weights, or I imagine them thinking, "What is a girl like her doing over here?" My physique doesn't exactly scream "toned and muscular," after all (which of course is why I need to use the weights). Even if I enter the gym that day intending to use the free weights, I may leave without doing so, which is what happened on Friday. I did my requisite cardio and kept waiting for the weights area to be free of testosterone, but no such luck. So I left. Lame, huh?
I know this fear is irrational and silly and that the men are more than likely admiring their own muscles in the mirror instead of being concerned with my lack of muscle, and I try giving myself a little pep talk each time before I go, but I end up wimping out anyway. I have some weights at home, but not a lot, and I know I would benefit from using the wide range of weights that the gym offers. I need to get past this fear, so I am pledging to all of my readers that I will face this fear THIS week! If I don't, I give all of you permission to call me out on it!
Is there anything you dread doing but know you need to do it? How do you get past the dread and just do it?
Tuesday, September 29, 2009
Monday, September 28, 2009
Hit the Road, Jack, and Don't You Come Back No More!
Today I weighed in at 186.4, which means that I have lost exactly 75 pounds!! It's taken me 20 months to do it, but I did it! And I don't plan to EVER see those pounds again. They are gone, and I have gained so much more from this journey than I ever thought I would. I am a runner, for crying out loud! If you had asked any of my friends if they thought I would ever be a runner, I'm sure they all would have said no. I would have said no and laughed. A LOT. And yet I am a runner! I have gained self-confidence and self-awareness. And here's what I've learned:
--I have learned to monitor my eating and make healthier choices.
--I have learned not to give up even when I feel like a massive failure.
--I have learned that healthy living is about DAILY choices and commitment.
--I have learned to own up to my mistakes but to also learn from them and move on.
--I have learned that I enjoy exercise.
--I have learned that losing control at one meal does not mean the whole day is a complete loss.
--I have learned that I can lose weight and keep it off.
--I have learned that it feels better to be healthy than to be overweight.
--I have learned that it feels better to choose healthy foods over junk.
--I have learned that weight loss is not easy, but it is worth the effort. Few things that are worthwhile come easily.
--I have learned that weight loss is a battle of the heart and mind as much as the body.
--I have learned that in Christ alone will I be satisfied. Food does not love me back.
I am so grateful for the support of my sweet husband, who has been my greatest source of support and encouragement. I am not sure I would have made it this far had he not been there with me in the beginning, waking up at 6 a.m. so he could go with me to the gym. I am grateful to all of you, my blog readers, my real life friends, who have cheered me on and given me wisdom and perspective. Thank you, thank you!
I still have 25 more pounds I would like to lose, and I have a feeling they are going to be hardest of all, but I am going for it. I have to because if I don't, I will always wonder what might have been. I am going to make the most of each day, and I hope you will, too!
A picture taken in March of 2008, about 2 months into my journey:
A picture taken today, 75 pounds GONE:
--I have learned to monitor my eating and make healthier choices.
--I have learned not to give up even when I feel like a massive failure.
--I have learned that healthy living is about DAILY choices and commitment.
--I have learned to own up to my mistakes but to also learn from them and move on.
--I have learned that I enjoy exercise.
--I have learned that losing control at one meal does not mean the whole day is a complete loss.
--I have learned that I can lose weight and keep it off.
--I have learned that it feels better to be healthy than to be overweight.
--I have learned that it feels better to choose healthy foods over junk.
--I have learned that weight loss is not easy, but it is worth the effort. Few things that are worthwhile come easily.
--I have learned that weight loss is a battle of the heart and mind as much as the body.
--I have learned that in Christ alone will I be satisfied. Food does not love me back.
I am so grateful for the support of my sweet husband, who has been my greatest source of support and encouragement. I am not sure I would have made it this far had he not been there with me in the beginning, waking up at 6 a.m. so he could go with me to the gym. I am grateful to all of you, my blog readers, my real life friends, who have cheered me on and given me wisdom and perspective. Thank you, thank you!
I still have 25 more pounds I would like to lose, and I have a feeling they are going to be hardest of all, but I am going for it. I have to because if I don't, I will always wonder what might have been. I am going to make the most of each day, and I hope you will, too!
A picture taken in March of 2008, about 2 months into my journey:
A picture taken today, 75 pounds GONE:
Friday, September 25, 2009
Friday Five: Things I Love about Fall
Fall is my favorite season, and here's why:
1. I love the way the leaves change and dot the landscape with bursts of color.
2. I love that I get to wear sweaters and cardigans and hooded sweatshirts.
3. I love the crisp air in the morning and the cooler temperatures.
4. I love the crunch of leaves under my feet.
5. I love sitting in front of the first fire of the season, drinking hot chocolate.
What is your favorite season? What do you love about it?
1. I love the way the leaves change and dot the landscape with bursts of color.
2. I love that I get to wear sweaters and cardigans and hooded sweatshirts.
3. I love the crisp air in the morning and the cooler temperatures.
4. I love the crunch of leaves under my feet.
5. I love sitting in front of the first fire of the season, drinking hot chocolate.
What is your favorite season? What do you love about it?
Wednesday, September 23, 2009
How People Find My Blog
The following are some of the search terms people entered that led them to my blog, according to Site Meter:
1. "Yoga makes me laugh." Well, that's better than it making you ill.
2. "Words used to describe a happy plate." Um, how about "happy"? My thoughts on the happy plate are here.
3. "Afraid I'll be a bad mom." I'm not really sure how this led to my blog, and even when I did a search with the same phrase, I got nothing related to my blog. I am sometimes afraid I will be a bad mom, however, and apparently I'm not alone. :)
4. "Actually yes, I don't have any friends. Will you be my friend?"
5. "Will you be my friend? Check yes or no?" 4 and 5 were no doubt led to this post.
6. "Caught between the moon and New York city." This phrase has landed more people at my blog than perhaps any other, and that's because of this post.
7. "A pap doctor me." Ummmm...
8. "Need to break up night before trip." Oh, don't do that. That's sad.
9. "My preschool blogspot." I'm sure they were disappointed that my blog has nothing to do with preschool, although I have written about Stephen's and my experiences in extended session.
10. "Weight loss quotes Gilmore Girls." I have written on both of those topics, but I'm not sure they really belong together...
Do you know of any funny ways people have found your blogs?
1. "Yoga makes me laugh." Well, that's better than it making you ill.
2. "Words used to describe a happy plate." Um, how about "happy"? My thoughts on the happy plate are here.
3. "Afraid I'll be a bad mom." I'm not really sure how this led to my blog, and even when I did a search with the same phrase, I got nothing related to my blog. I am sometimes afraid I will be a bad mom, however, and apparently I'm not alone. :)
4. "Actually yes, I don't have any friends. Will you be my friend?"
5. "Will you be my friend? Check yes or no?" 4 and 5 were no doubt led to this post.
6. "Caught between the moon and New York city." This phrase has landed more people at my blog than perhaps any other, and that's because of this post.
7. "A pap doctor me." Ummmm...
8. "Need to break up night before trip." Oh, don't do that. That's sad.
9. "My preschool blogspot." I'm sure they were disappointed that my blog has nothing to do with preschool, although I have written about Stephen's and my experiences in extended session.
10. "Weight loss quotes Gilmore Girls." I have written on both of those topics, but I'm not sure they really belong together...
Do you know of any funny ways people have found your blogs?
Tuesday, September 22, 2009
Should Running and I Break Up?
I cannot decide how I feel about running. I have never felt so fickle towards anything as I feel towards running. One day I love it, the next day I hate it. I loved it for almost the whole month of August, and then all of a sudden, the pleasure was gone. Every run I've done this month has just been something to suffer through, not something I've enjoyed. So why do I keep doing it? I have no idea. It hasn't helped me lose weight, so it's not as though I'm doing it for that reason. I do know that on the days when I have good runs, I have really really good runs--runs that leave me feeling exhausted but exhilarated and alive. When I have a bad run, I am left feeling discouraged and spent. I think in the past running was something I never really thought I could do, and the old me--the lazy, grossly obese me--definitely wouldn't have been able to do it, but now? Now I can do it, and so I feel like I need to take advantage of my ability to do it, but is it worth it?
I have tried to figure out what was different about August, to find some clues as to why running was so enjoyable then and not now, but I can't figure it out. In August, I had a goal of running 100 minutes every week, and I ran distances of 5 and 6 miles a few times. My longest run was about 72 minutes, and while it was difficult, I really enjoyed it. This month, I increased my goal to 120 minutes a week, but I can't believe that has made the difference in my not wanting to do it anymore. I didn't even meet that goal the first two weeks, but I didn't really try, either, and last week I ran 140 minutes, so I'm kind of all over the place in terms of my time spent running.
Perhaps I am thinking about it all too much. Perhaps I need to stop worrying about whether or not I can do a half marathon and when I should do it. Perhaps I need to stop setting minute goals for myself and just run when I feel like it. Perhaps I need a break from running altogether for a while. I don't want to be in a place where I hate running all the time.
I'm not sure I'm ready to break up with running just yet, but something needs to change. Any ideas?
I have tried to figure out what was different about August, to find some clues as to why running was so enjoyable then and not now, but I can't figure it out. In August, I had a goal of running 100 minutes every week, and I ran distances of 5 and 6 miles a few times. My longest run was about 72 minutes, and while it was difficult, I really enjoyed it. This month, I increased my goal to 120 minutes a week, but I can't believe that has made the difference in my not wanting to do it anymore. I didn't even meet that goal the first two weeks, but I didn't really try, either, and last week I ran 140 minutes, so I'm kind of all over the place in terms of my time spent running.
Perhaps I am thinking about it all too much. Perhaps I need to stop worrying about whether or not I can do a half marathon and when I should do it. Perhaps I need to stop setting minute goals for myself and just run when I feel like it. Perhaps I need a break from running altogether for a while. I don't want to be in a place where I hate running all the time.
I'm not sure I'm ready to break up with running just yet, but something needs to change. Any ideas?
Monday, September 21, 2009
September Goals Checkup
Last week's weight: 187.4
This week's weight: 187.0
Total loss for the month: 2.8 pounds
The results are a bit underwhelming, to be sure, but I'll take a loss over a gain any day. Still, I'm only .2 pounds off track of my goal to lose 4 pounds this month, so hopefully I can lose that last 1.2 pounds by the end of the month!
The week overall went well, in my opinion. I exercised 6 days out of the week, burned 3600+ calories, ran 140 minutes, and even did one session of Pilates (30 minutes of the 10 Minute Solutions: Slim and Sculpt Pilates DVD). I am definitely going to add more Pilates back into my workouts, as I was sore for three days after that workout, and I know it's good for me. I ate after 8 p.m. one night, but I did not have any beverages besides water, I kept up with my Bible reading, and I tracked all of my food. I wish there could have been a little more weight loss shown on the scale, but I was successful in so many other areas that I will not be discouraged!
Stay tuned for tomorrow's post in which I discuss my ongoing, conflicted feelings about running.
This week's weight: 187.0
Total loss for the month: 2.8 pounds
The results are a bit underwhelming, to be sure, but I'll take a loss over a gain any day. Still, I'm only .2 pounds off track of my goal to lose 4 pounds this month, so hopefully I can lose that last 1.2 pounds by the end of the month!
The week overall went well, in my opinion. I exercised 6 days out of the week, burned 3600+ calories, ran 140 minutes, and even did one session of Pilates (30 minutes of the 10 Minute Solutions: Slim and Sculpt Pilates DVD). I am definitely going to add more Pilates back into my workouts, as I was sore for three days after that workout, and I know it's good for me. I ate after 8 p.m. one night, but I did not have any beverages besides water, I kept up with my Bible reading, and I tracked all of my food. I wish there could have been a little more weight loss shown on the scale, but I was successful in so many other areas that I will not be discouraged!
Stay tuned for tomorrow's post in which I discuss my ongoing, conflicted feelings about running.
Friday, September 18, 2009
Friday Five: Quotes from The Office
Last night was the sixth season premiere of The Office, and in honor of that, I'm listing some of my favorite quotes. This was almost an impossible task because there are fabulous quotes in pretty much every episode, but here are some that are memorable to me. "That's what she said" does not make the list because, well, it's obvious. :)
1. Michael Scott: "Wikipedia is the best thing ever. Anyone in the world can write anything they want about any subject, so you know you are getting the best possible information." I actually used this quote in a handout I gave to my students about the pitfalls of using Wikipedia as a source.
2. Andy Bernard: “I am a great interviewee. Why? Because I have something no one else has. My brain. Which I use to my advantage, when advantageous.”
3. Michael: “Guess what? I have flaws. What are they? Oh I don't know... I sing in the shower. Sometimes I spend too much time volunteering. Occasionally I'll hit somebody with my car. So sue me. No, don't sue me... that's the opposite of the point I'm trying to make.”
4. Dwight Schrute: “When my mother was pregnant with me, they did an ultrasound and found she was having twins. When they did another ultrasound a few weeks later, they discovered, that I had resorbed the other fetus. Do I regret this? No. I believe his tissue has made me stronger. I now have the strength of a grown man and a little baby.”
5. This is an exchange between Jim and Dwight, possibly one of the best ever:
Dwight: Welcome to the Hotel Hell. Check in time now. Check out time is never.
Jim: Does my room have cable?
Dwight: No, and the sheets are made of fire!
Jim: Can I change rooms?
Dwight: No, we're all booked up. Hell convention in town!
Jim: Can I have a late check out?
[pauses]
Dwight: I'll have to talk to the manager.
Jim: You're not the manager...even in your own fantasy?
Dwight: I'm the owner....co-owner. With Satan!
Jim: Okay, just so I understand it...in your wildest fantasy, you are in hell. And you are co-running a bed and breakfast with the devil.
Dwight: But I haven't told you my salary.
Jim: Go.
Dwight: Eighty thousand dollars a year!
Honorable mentions:
Dwight: “Once I’m officially regional manager, my first order of business will be to demote Jim Halpert. So I will need a new number two. My ideal choice? Jack Bauer. But he is unavailable. Fictional. And overqualified.”
Michael: “I love inside jokes. I'd like to be a part of one some day.”
If you watch The Office, what are some of your favorite quotes or favorite episodes?
1. Michael Scott: "Wikipedia is the best thing ever. Anyone in the world can write anything they want about any subject, so you know you are getting the best possible information." I actually used this quote in a handout I gave to my students about the pitfalls of using Wikipedia as a source.
2. Andy Bernard: “I am a great interviewee. Why? Because I have something no one else has. My brain. Which I use to my advantage, when advantageous.”
3. Michael: “Guess what? I have flaws. What are they? Oh I don't know... I sing in the shower. Sometimes I spend too much time volunteering. Occasionally I'll hit somebody with my car. So sue me. No, don't sue me... that's the opposite of the point I'm trying to make.”
4. Dwight Schrute: “When my mother was pregnant with me, they did an ultrasound and found she was having twins. When they did another ultrasound a few weeks later, they discovered, that I had resorbed the other fetus. Do I regret this? No. I believe his tissue has made me stronger. I now have the strength of a grown man and a little baby.”
5. This is an exchange between Jim and Dwight, possibly one of the best ever:
Dwight: Welcome to the Hotel Hell. Check in time now. Check out time is never.
Jim: Does my room have cable?
Dwight: No, and the sheets are made of fire!
Jim: Can I change rooms?
Dwight: No, we're all booked up. Hell convention in town!
Jim: Can I have a late check out?
[pauses]
Dwight: I'll have to talk to the manager.
Jim: You're not the manager...even in your own fantasy?
Dwight: I'm the owner....co-owner. With Satan!
Jim: Okay, just so I understand it...in your wildest fantasy, you are in hell. And you are co-running a bed and breakfast with the devil.
Dwight: But I haven't told you my salary.
Jim: Go.
Dwight: Eighty thousand dollars a year!
Honorable mentions:
Dwight: “Once I’m officially regional manager, my first order of business will be to demote Jim Halpert. So I will need a new number two. My ideal choice? Jack Bauer. But he is unavailable. Fictional. And overqualified.”
Michael: “I love inside jokes. I'd like to be a part of one some day.”
If you watch The Office, what are some of your favorite quotes or favorite episodes?
Thursday, September 17, 2009
Water Does a Body Good
One of my goals for September was to drink only water for the entire month. I initially thought this would not be that difficult because I happen to really enjoy drinking water, especially from water bottles, and I don't drink a ton of other beverages anyway. However, I must confess to you that I already messed up with this goal, although it was purely accidental. Or unconscious. Or just stupid. You decide...
On Labor Day the hubs and I made a trip to Target just to look around and see if we could find a new dog toy for our dog Bailey, and then when we were leaving we decided to get an Icee. I haven't had an Icee in a long time, and it sounded so good. I got a Coke-flavored Icee, and I was halfway through with it when I turned to Stephen and said, "Oh my goodness, this isn't water!" He looked at me blankly, no doubt wondering why I was stating the obvious, until I reminded him of my goal not to drink anything but water. Then we talked about whether or not a frozen drink really counted, and even though I would love to think it doesn't, the fact that it had Coke in it worked against me.
So, I had a Coke in frozen form, readers. BUT that is the only drink I have had besides water, so I think I am still doing pretty well. I am averaging about 100 ounces a day of water, and after a workout there is nothing so refreshing as cold water. Drinking water has many benefits (see this SparkPeople article for details), and I love seeing how much water I can consume in one day. I still want a Coke Zero or Diet Pepsi every now and then, but I haven't had any withdrawal headaches, so at least I know I wasn't drinking it so often that I was addicted. I know the artificial sweeteners in diet drinks are not good for the body, so I am hoping that after this month I can really limit my intake of them, as I've also read that often diet drinks have been found to cause people to eat more, especially foods with sugar in them. As we all know, I have enough problems with eating too much, so I don't need diet soda adding to my troubles!
Do you have trouble drinking enough water? Here's another SparkPeople article with tips on getting enough water.
On Labor Day the hubs and I made a trip to Target just to look around and see if we could find a new dog toy for our dog Bailey, and then when we were leaving we decided to get an Icee. I haven't had an Icee in a long time, and it sounded so good. I got a Coke-flavored Icee, and I was halfway through with it when I turned to Stephen and said, "Oh my goodness, this isn't water!" He looked at me blankly, no doubt wondering why I was stating the obvious, until I reminded him of my goal not to drink anything but water. Then we talked about whether or not a frozen drink really counted, and even though I would love to think it doesn't, the fact that it had Coke in it worked against me.
So, I had a Coke in frozen form, readers. BUT that is the only drink I have had besides water, so I think I am still doing pretty well. I am averaging about 100 ounces a day of water, and after a workout there is nothing so refreshing as cold water. Drinking water has many benefits (see this SparkPeople article for details), and I love seeing how much water I can consume in one day. I still want a Coke Zero or Diet Pepsi every now and then, but I haven't had any withdrawal headaches, so at least I know I wasn't drinking it so often that I was addicted. I know the artificial sweeteners in diet drinks are not good for the body, so I am hoping that after this month I can really limit my intake of them, as I've also read that often diet drinks have been found to cause people to eat more, especially foods with sugar in them. As we all know, I have enough problems with eating too much, so I don't need diet soda adding to my troubles!
Do you have trouble drinking enough water? Here's another SparkPeople article with tips on getting enough water.
Wednesday, September 16, 2009
This Entry Brought to You by the Color Purple
If you know me well, you know I love the color purple. I was no aware of how obvious this love could sometimes be until one day in class a student (a male, no less) asked me if purple was my favorite color. Surprised, I said yes and then asked how he knew that. He said, "You kind of wear it a lot." Oops. Clinton and Stacy would not be proud.
I also have another, lesser known love. Allow me to demonstrate with a picture:
Yes, that's right. I love water bottles. The criteria by which I select these bottles is very important. There are a few essentials a bottle MUST have if I am to purchase it:
1. It must hold at least 24 oz. of water. I drink a lot of water, so the less I have to refill a bottle, the better.
2. It must have either a straw or an easy-to-access top. I do not like bottles that just have lids that screw off--too time consuming and annoying. And as mentioned before, I love straws, so I am super excited when I find bottles that have them as well.
3. It must not cost more than $8. I don't want to spend a fortune on something that holds a beverage that costs me nothing.
That's pretty much it. I like a bottle that looks cute, but I have passed up many a pretty bottle for not meeting the above criteria, which is why I am in possession of the first bottle in the above picture. It has a pop-top, a handle, holds 32 oz. of water, and cost me all of $1.50. It's the most boring bottle ever, but it serves its purpose. The third bottle in the picture was my favorite, as it is from SeaWorld (though you wouldn't know this because the genius who took the picture did not face the SeaWorld label toward the camera). Note that I said it was my favorite, however, because over the holiday weekend, my husband and I were in Kohl's, and he directed me to this:
I could almost hear the choir of angels singing for joy. It is not only purple, my favorite color, but it holds a whopping 64 oz. (the recommended daily intake), has a straw and a handle, and also has the ounces measured out on the side of the bottle so I can see how much I have drunk. Plus, it was on sale for $6.99 (50% off). There was nothing to do but purchase it.
Now, the downside to this bottle is its size. When full, it weighs approximately 4.5 pounds (thank you, food scale), and it takes up quite a bit of space in the fridge, especially when combined with the other four bottles, and as my husband pointed out, do I really need 6 bottles in the fridge at a time? No. So I actually got rid of one (not pictured), put another one away, and now there are 4 bottles in the fridge. Still, the new one is my favorite, and I think we're going to be very happy together.
Note: I did not in fact plan to wear purple in this picture. That was just a happy coincidence. :)
I also have another, lesser known love. Allow me to demonstrate with a picture:
Yes, that's right. I love water bottles. The criteria by which I select these bottles is very important. There are a few essentials a bottle MUST have if I am to purchase it:
1. It must hold at least 24 oz. of water. I drink a lot of water, so the less I have to refill a bottle, the better.
2. It must have either a straw or an easy-to-access top. I do not like bottles that just have lids that screw off--too time consuming and annoying. And as mentioned before, I love straws, so I am super excited when I find bottles that have them as well.
3. It must not cost more than $8. I don't want to spend a fortune on something that holds a beverage that costs me nothing.
That's pretty much it. I like a bottle that looks cute, but I have passed up many a pretty bottle for not meeting the above criteria, which is why I am in possession of the first bottle in the above picture. It has a pop-top, a handle, holds 32 oz. of water, and cost me all of $1.50. It's the most boring bottle ever, but it serves its purpose. The third bottle in the picture was my favorite, as it is from SeaWorld (though you wouldn't know this because the genius who took the picture did not face the SeaWorld label toward the camera). Note that I said it was my favorite, however, because over the holiday weekend, my husband and I were in Kohl's, and he directed me to this:
I could almost hear the choir of angels singing for joy. It is not only purple, my favorite color, but it holds a whopping 64 oz. (the recommended daily intake), has a straw and a handle, and also has the ounces measured out on the side of the bottle so I can see how much I have drunk. Plus, it was on sale for $6.99 (50% off). There was nothing to do but purchase it.
Now, the downside to this bottle is its size. When full, it weighs approximately 4.5 pounds (thank you, food scale), and it takes up quite a bit of space in the fridge, especially when combined with the other four bottles, and as my husband pointed out, do I really need 6 bottles in the fridge at a time? No. So I actually got rid of one (not pictured), put another one away, and now there are 4 bottles in the fridge. Still, the new one is my favorite, and I think we're going to be very happy together.
Note: I did not in fact plan to wear purple in this picture. That was just a happy coincidence. :)
Tuesday, September 15, 2009
Missing: Endurance
One thing I realized yesterday when I attempted to run was that my endurance disappears quickly. I only ran once last week for about 40 minutes, and the week before that I only ran for about 90 minutes total. (And yes, my goal was 120 minutes a week. Yikes.) Well, the lack of running definitely took its toll, since yesterday I only managed to run for 25 minutes! The whole time I was running I felt like I was back in my Couch to 5k training, when things like 8 minute runs seemed impossible. The weather wasn't even a factor in the difficult run, either, since it was in the low 70s and cloudy, so I can't blame it on that (rats!). I am hoping that tomorrow's run will be easier and that I can manage at least 40 minutes. If I can't get back on track, there is no way I will be able to manage an 8 mile run by the end of the month.
I'm also rethinking my plan of running the half marathon in December. I am not sure I am ready for that. I only started running about six months ago, and it wasn't until May that I was running 3 miles, so is it too soon to be thinking about running 13 miles? I confess to being more than a little intimidated by the distance. I know I still have a lot of time to plan for it, but I feel like I need to get in a regular habit of running longer runs every week (without each one feeling incredibly difficult) before I can do the half marathon. There is a half marathon in Germantown in March of next year, and the Country Music Half in Nashville in April, and I think by the spring I definitely will be more ready for a longer race. I know I can run a half marathon; I just want to make sure I don't try to do too much too soon. Am I being a wimp?
I'm also rethinking my plan of running the half marathon in December. I am not sure I am ready for that. I only started running about six months ago, and it wasn't until May that I was running 3 miles, so is it too soon to be thinking about running 13 miles? I confess to being more than a little intimidated by the distance. I know I still have a lot of time to plan for it, but I feel like I need to get in a regular habit of running longer runs every week (without each one feeling incredibly difficult) before I can do the half marathon. There is a half marathon in Germantown in March of next year, and the Country Music Half in Nashville in April, and I think by the spring I definitely will be more ready for a longer race. I know I can run a half marathon; I just want to make sure I don't try to do too much too soon. Am I being a wimp?
Monday, September 14, 2009
Owning Up to Mistakes
The blog was kind of quiet last week, and to be honest, it is because I didn't want to have to admit to everyone that I was not doing well with my healthy lifestyle. To recap: I ate out 4 times, I only exercised twice, and I basically was apathetic and lazy. Not my proudest moment, for sure, and so I avoided the blog. However, I know that I can't just gloss over last week but that I need to address it, so this is me addressing it. This is me admitting that even after losing almost 75 pounds, I still don't have this whole thing figured out. I still make really bad choices some days. I still wimp out on exercise. I still doubt that I will reach my goal. I still struggle with feeling insecure and wondering why I don't see more real changes in my body after having lost so much weight. I still fear that I will gain all my weight back. I still lose control with food. And while individually all of these issues are not so hard to deal with, it seems that I had to battle all of them last week, and I just didn't want to. I want to be one of those people who doesn't have to think about every morsel of food that goes in my mouth, but does that person even exist? I don't even know, but if such a person does exist, I am not sure I will ever be at the place where I won't have to think about what I eat to some extent, and that is discouraging.
However, I think my tendency to dwell on the negative is what stalls my progress many times, so I don't want to sit around and think about the person I am not; I want to do everything I can to achieve what I know is possible! I have to remember what I have accomplished by adopting this lifestyle. I have lost 74 pounds. I went from barely being able to tolerate 10 minutes on the elliptical to running a 5k, and I am running even longer distances than that. I have gone from a size 24 to a size 16. I have excellent blood sugar levels, good blood pressure, and a healthy resting heart rate. I am active (well, except for last week), and more often than not I enjoy exercise. The Erin of two years ago could not say ANY of these things! And even though I have imperfect weeks like last week, I keep trying. I will not give up. I will not go back to who I was before beginning this journey. I am going to finish what I started.
Despite the disastrous week, I miraculously maintained my weight of 187.4, and I hope that next Monday I can say goodbye to another pound. The plan is to achieve all of the goals I set for September. More than that, however, I want to look back on this week and know that I gave it my best effort, not just a halfhearted attempt. If I give it everything I have, then I how can I not succeed?
However, I think my tendency to dwell on the negative is what stalls my progress many times, so I don't want to sit around and think about the person I am not; I want to do everything I can to achieve what I know is possible! I have to remember what I have accomplished by adopting this lifestyle. I have lost 74 pounds. I went from barely being able to tolerate 10 minutes on the elliptical to running a 5k, and I am running even longer distances than that. I have gone from a size 24 to a size 16. I have excellent blood sugar levels, good blood pressure, and a healthy resting heart rate. I am active (well, except for last week), and more often than not I enjoy exercise. The Erin of two years ago could not say ANY of these things! And even though I have imperfect weeks like last week, I keep trying. I will not give up. I will not go back to who I was before beginning this journey. I am going to finish what I started.
Despite the disastrous week, I miraculously maintained my weight of 187.4, and I hope that next Monday I can say goodbye to another pound. The plan is to achieve all of the goals I set for September. More than that, however, I want to look back on this week and know that I gave it my best effort, not just a halfhearted attempt. If I give it everything I have, then I how can I not succeed?
Wednesday, September 9, 2009
Adventures in Baking
I blame it all on The Food Network.
On Saturday, Hubby and I were watching The Best Thing I Ever Ate (all about pizza), and Aaron Sanchez was talking about this amazing dessert pizza he loved. Then we watched him eating it, and we knew that we too needed to make a dessert pizza. Hubby was all excited about it and had ideas, but I was a little skeptical, since I am the consummate recipe follower. I don't invent my own culinary creations; I don't even like to deviate from a recipe, so the thought of attempting something without so much as as an ingredient list was slightly terrifying. However, hubby convinced me to try it, so we went to the kitchen for a little food reconnaissance. Turns out we had everything we needed to make our very own pizza! Here's what we used:
1 can Pillsbury pizza crust dough (No, I do not make my own dough. Sue me.)
Toll House chocolate chips (any other kind just won't do, in my opinion)
Peanut butter
Miniature marshmallows
Pecans, slightly chopped
I have no idea what quantities we used because it was definitely more of an eyeballing endeavor, but we started by rolling out the pizza crust. Then we generously sprinkled chocolate chips all over the crust, followed by dollops of peanut butter placed in various places. Then we added the marshmallows and pecans, and we finished it off with a drizzle of Hershey's chocolate syrup. Here's what it looked like before we baked it:
And after it was finished:
If we make it again, we'll wait to do the chocolate drizzle until after we've baked the pizza, but overall, it was ten kinds of delicious. The chocolate chips were slightly melted but not too gooey, the marshmallows had a nice toasty flavor, and the peanut butter was a wonderful compliment to the whole pizza. It was our dinner that night, and because it was a holiday weekend, the calories don't count. Right? ;)
Now, the only thing left to decide is what to call it. I was thinking of calling it Peanut Butter S'mores Pizza, but it doesn't have graham crackers, so that name is not entirely accurate. I suppose if I'm going for accuracy I should just call it Weight Gain Pizza. :) I also thought of calling it Paradise on a Pizza, but I'm open to other suggestions. Any ideas?
One more thing: thanks to all of you for your thoughts on my running/weight loss dilemma. The consensus seems to be that running makes me hungrier which means I eat more, and I think this is definitely true, so I am going to have be more mindful of how much I eat on running days. While some runners brag that they can eat whatever they want because they run, I am not one of those people, so I don't need to give myself that excuse to go off the caloric deep end.
On Saturday, Hubby and I were watching The Best Thing I Ever Ate (all about pizza), and Aaron Sanchez was talking about this amazing dessert pizza he loved. Then we watched him eating it, and we knew that we too needed to make a dessert pizza. Hubby was all excited about it and had ideas, but I was a little skeptical, since I am the consummate recipe follower. I don't invent my own culinary creations; I don't even like to deviate from a recipe, so the thought of attempting something without so much as as an ingredient list was slightly terrifying. However, hubby convinced me to try it, so we went to the kitchen for a little food reconnaissance. Turns out we had everything we needed to make our very own pizza! Here's what we used:
1 can Pillsbury pizza crust dough (No, I do not make my own dough. Sue me.)
Toll House chocolate chips (any other kind just won't do, in my opinion)
Peanut butter
Miniature marshmallows
Pecans, slightly chopped
I have no idea what quantities we used because it was definitely more of an eyeballing endeavor, but we started by rolling out the pizza crust. Then we generously sprinkled chocolate chips all over the crust, followed by dollops of peanut butter placed in various places. Then we added the marshmallows and pecans, and we finished it off with a drizzle of Hershey's chocolate syrup. Here's what it looked like before we baked it:
 |
| From Blogger Pictures |
And after it was finished:
 |
| From Blogger Pictures |
If we make it again, we'll wait to do the chocolate drizzle until after we've baked the pizza, but overall, it was ten kinds of delicious. The chocolate chips were slightly melted but not too gooey, the marshmallows had a nice toasty flavor, and the peanut butter was a wonderful compliment to the whole pizza. It was our dinner that night, and because it was a holiday weekend, the calories don't count. Right? ;)
Now, the only thing left to decide is what to call it. I was thinking of calling it Peanut Butter S'mores Pizza, but it doesn't have graham crackers, so that name is not entirely accurate. I suppose if I'm going for accuracy I should just call it Weight Gain Pizza. :) I also thought of calling it Paradise on a Pizza, but I'm open to other suggestions. Any ideas?
One more thing: thanks to all of you for your thoughts on my running/weight loss dilemma. The consensus seems to be that running makes me hungrier which means I eat more, and I think this is definitely true, so I am going to have be more mindful of how much I eat on running days. While some runners brag that they can eat whatever they want because they run, I am not one of those people, so I don't need to give myself that excuse to go off the caloric deep end.
Tuesday, September 8, 2009
Sometimes Weight Loss Doesn't Make Sense
I hope those of you who had a long weekend enjoyed it. We certainly enjoyed ours. It was nice and relaxing, and even though our viewing of The Time Traveler's Wife was interrupted by technical difficulties that resulted in us missing the last 25 or so minutes of the movie (!), that was only a slight setback. I will blog more on Wednesday about the delicious concoction Hubby and I made on Saturday. You will either judge me or be incredibly jealous. Maybe both. :)
But now, a weight loss update. After a summer of little weight loss (aside from 4 pounds lost in June), I finally saw the scale move! I went from 189.8 to 187.4--down 2.4 pounds! That's a HUGE loss for me, and I have to say that I really don't get it. Last week was far from a perfect healthy week, so why did I lose? After thinking about it, here is how last week was different from previous weeks:
1. I drank only water.
2. I did yoga.
3. I tried to go hungry more. I don't mean I starved myself; I just didn't immediately reach for food the minute I thought I was hungry. I drank water, and if I was still hungry, I would eat fruit or something equally as innocuous. Every night when I went to bed, I was slightly hungry, and I think that really helped.
4. I tracked all of my food. There were some things I wasn't able to record the nutritional information for, but I still recorded the food and when I ate it so as to keep myself accountable.
5. I only ran twice.
From this list, I can then conclude the following:
1. Drinking only water, while challenging, is good for me.
2. Yoga isn't completely evil.
3. Being hungry isn't always bad. (And I'm not the only one who thinks so. See this post from Diane at Fit to the Finish.)
4. Tracking all of my food is beneficial.
5. Running keeps me from losing weight.
Okay, okay, I know #5 is ridiculous, but honestly, I can't help but think it! Is it a coincidence that my weight loss started slowing down around the same time I started running regularly? This past week was the first week I hadn't run three times or more, and I lost weight for the first time in a long time. It could very well be that I lost muscle this past week, or perhaps it's just a combination of all the factors I've mentioned, but I can't help but wonder if my running is preventing me from losing weight. So many people have told me that running is great for weight loss and yet I have not seen that to be true for ME. What does that mean? I have no idea. I'm just throwing it out there. I'm not going to give up running, but I do think I would benefit from varied exercise, since I have done walking and running almost exclusively all summer long. So I'm going to try and add in a Pilates session once a week, as well as do more with my stability ball, and we'll see what happens!
But now, a weight loss update. After a summer of little weight loss (aside from 4 pounds lost in June), I finally saw the scale move! I went from 189.8 to 187.4--down 2.4 pounds! That's a HUGE loss for me, and I have to say that I really don't get it. Last week was far from a perfect healthy week, so why did I lose? After thinking about it, here is how last week was different from previous weeks:
1. I drank only water.
2. I did yoga.
3. I tried to go hungry more. I don't mean I starved myself; I just didn't immediately reach for food the minute I thought I was hungry. I drank water, and if I was still hungry, I would eat fruit or something equally as innocuous. Every night when I went to bed, I was slightly hungry, and I think that really helped.
4. I tracked all of my food. There were some things I wasn't able to record the nutritional information for, but I still recorded the food and when I ate it so as to keep myself accountable.
5. I only ran twice.
From this list, I can then conclude the following:
1. Drinking only water, while challenging, is good for me.
2. Yoga isn't completely evil.
3. Being hungry isn't always bad. (And I'm not the only one who thinks so. See this post from Diane at Fit to the Finish.)
4. Tracking all of my food is beneficial.
5. Running keeps me from losing weight.
Okay, okay, I know #5 is ridiculous, but honestly, I can't help but think it! Is it a coincidence that my weight loss started slowing down around the same time I started running regularly? This past week was the first week I hadn't run three times or more, and I lost weight for the first time in a long time. It could very well be that I lost muscle this past week, or perhaps it's just a combination of all the factors I've mentioned, but I can't help but wonder if my running is preventing me from losing weight. So many people have told me that running is great for weight loss and yet I have not seen that to be true for ME. What does that mean? I have no idea. I'm just throwing it out there. I'm not going to give up running, but I do think I would benefit from varied exercise, since I have done walking and running almost exclusively all summer long. So I'm going to try and add in a Pilates session once a week, as well as do more with my stability ball, and we'll see what happens!
Friday, September 4, 2009
Friday Five: Gilmore Girls Quotes
For this week's Friday Five, I've chosen five quotes from my favorite TV show of all time, Gilmore Girls. There are a lot of quotes to choose from, but I picked ones that really stuck out to me. Enjoy!
1. Spoken by Paris about a student she's tutoring: "She's got a C average which means she's either lazy or stupid. I can work with either. Frankly sometimes stupid is easier. I can scare the stupid out of you, but the lazy runs deep."
2. Lorelai: Huh. You know what I just realized? Oy is the funniest word in the entire world. I mean, think about it. You never hear the word oy and not smile. Impossible. Funny, funny word. Poodle is another funny word.
Emily: Please drink your drink, Lorelai.
Lorelai: In fact, if you put oy and poodle together in the same sentence, you’d have a great new catch phrase, you know? Like, “Oy with the poodles already.” So from now on, when the perfect circumstances arise, we will use our favorite new catch phrase.
Rory: Oy with the poodles already!
Lorelai: I’m telling you, it’s knocking “Whatcha talking ’bout, Willis?” right out of first place.
3. Paris: "I can't help it. Any way I look at it, I'm right."
4. Sookie: I am so sad...and mad. I'm smad.
5. Jess: "Great, then we can hold hands and skip afterwards."
Honorable mentions
Paris: "I don't see anyone here who shouldn't be sterilized immediately."
Lorelai: "Copper boom!"
Luke: Rory's not here yet.
Lorelai: Then you'll have to entertain me until she arrives. Okay Burger boy, dance.
Luke: Will you marry me?
[Lorelai is taken aback]
Luke: Just looking for something to shut you up.
Logan: Rory, you're special.
Rory: Like "stop-eating-the-paste" special?
Lorelai: "The plural of cul-de-sac is culs-de-sac? That doesn't even sound like English."
Rory: "That's because it's French."
Okay, guess I should have just done a top 10.
If you're a fan of Gilmore Girls, what are your favorite quotes? If you're not a fan, I am sad for you, but feel free to share any other memorable quotes. :)
1. Spoken by Paris about a student she's tutoring: "She's got a C average which means she's either lazy or stupid. I can work with either. Frankly sometimes stupid is easier. I can scare the stupid out of you, but the lazy runs deep."
2. Lorelai: Huh. You know what I just realized? Oy is the funniest word in the entire world. I mean, think about it. You never hear the word oy and not smile. Impossible. Funny, funny word. Poodle is another funny word.
Emily: Please drink your drink, Lorelai.
Lorelai: In fact, if you put oy and poodle together in the same sentence, you’d have a great new catch phrase, you know? Like, “Oy with the poodles already.” So from now on, when the perfect circumstances arise, we will use our favorite new catch phrase.
Rory: Oy with the poodles already!
Lorelai: I’m telling you, it’s knocking “Whatcha talking ’bout, Willis?” right out of first place.
3. Paris: "I can't help it. Any way I look at it, I'm right."
4. Sookie: I am so sad...and mad. I'm smad.
5. Jess: "Great, then we can hold hands and skip afterwards."
Honorable mentions
Paris: "I don't see anyone here who shouldn't be sterilized immediately."
Lorelai: "Copper boom!"
Luke: Rory's not here yet.
Lorelai: Then you'll have to entertain me until she arrives. Okay Burger boy, dance.
Luke: Will you marry me?
[Lorelai is taken aback]
Luke: Just looking for something to shut you up.
Logan: Rory, you're special.
Rory: Like "stop-eating-the-paste" special?
Lorelai: "The plural of cul-de-sac is culs-de-sac? That doesn't even sound like English."
Rory: "That's because it's French."
Okay, guess I should have just done a top 10.
If you're a fan of Gilmore Girls, what are your favorite quotes? If you're not a fan, I am sad for you, but feel free to share any other memorable quotes. :)
Thursday, September 3, 2009
Yoga Makes Me Ill
Yoga is one of those kinds of exercise that I have always admired when other people do it but have never been brave enough to try it myself. I just told myself there was no way my body was going to be able to contort itself in all the different positions, and I was sure to make a fool of myself. I also wasn't interested in the more meditative aspects of yoga, preferring to save my "Om" for a really good piece of chocolate (as in, "Om, this chocolate is TASTY"). Plus, I knew it wasn't a huge calorie burner, and I'm the cardio queen, so if it doesn't burn a lot of calories, I don't want to do it! I know that mindset is a bit silly, and it's probably why I don't do more Pilates as well, even though I know it's beneficial.
Anyway, on Tuesday my friend and I met to go on a walk/run, and when her son wanted to go back home after 20 minutes or so, she asked me if I wanted to try the Biggest Loser Weight Loss yoga DVD with her. I agreed, though I was more than a little nervous about this new fitness endeavor. We got back to her house, her son playing with his train set and her daughter blissfully asleep in her car seat (she's 2 months old), and we put in the DVD. The familiar face of Bob Harper filled the screen, and with him are Biggest Loser contestants from past seasons, including the annoying Vicky (fortunately I didn't really notice her much since I was focused on not dying). We go through a 5 minute warm up that isn't too difficult, and I'm thinking, "This yoga thing isn't so bad." Then the real workout began, complete with downward dogs and warrior 1 and warrior 2 and who knows what else, and it was not long before I was SWEATING and gasping and trying to keep my core "tight." There was more than one occasion where I said, "Is it OVER yet?" (The total workout, including the warm up and cool down, was only 30 minutes, but it really did seem longer.) Finally, the end came, and I felt...GOOD. The workout was challenging but not impossible, and I actually felt relaxed after it was over. I decided I was going to have to do yoga more often.
Then I woke up yesterday and felt awful. My body ached, my head hurt, and I was even a little lightheaded. Even though I had slept 8 hours and then took a 2 hour nap, I felt exhausted. There was only one explanation: evil, thy name is yoga! Yoga made me sick. Forget that I feel much better today and the aches in my body are probably just sore muscles. Clearly yoga has adverse effects on my body and so I can't do it again, right?
Right?
Hello? Anyone with me?
Of course, this month is National Yoga month, so perhaps I should give it another try...
Have you tried yoga? Did you like it?
Anyway, on Tuesday my friend and I met to go on a walk/run, and when her son wanted to go back home after 20 minutes or so, she asked me if I wanted to try the Biggest Loser Weight Loss yoga DVD with her. I agreed, though I was more than a little nervous about this new fitness endeavor. We got back to her house, her son playing with his train set and her daughter blissfully asleep in her car seat (she's 2 months old), and we put in the DVD. The familiar face of Bob Harper filled the screen, and with him are Biggest Loser contestants from past seasons, including the annoying Vicky (fortunately I didn't really notice her much since I was focused on not dying). We go through a 5 minute warm up that isn't too difficult, and I'm thinking, "This yoga thing isn't so bad." Then the real workout began, complete with downward dogs and warrior 1 and warrior 2 and who knows what else, and it was not long before I was SWEATING and gasping and trying to keep my core "tight." There was more than one occasion where I said, "Is it OVER yet?" (The total workout, including the warm up and cool down, was only 30 minutes, but it really did seem longer.) Finally, the end came, and I felt...GOOD. The workout was challenging but not impossible, and I actually felt relaxed after it was over. I decided I was going to have to do yoga more often.
Then I woke up yesterday and felt awful. My body ached, my head hurt, and I was even a little lightheaded. Even though I had slept 8 hours and then took a 2 hour nap, I felt exhausted. There was only one explanation: evil, thy name is yoga! Yoga made me sick. Forget that I feel much better today and the aches in my body are probably just sore muscles. Clearly yoga has adverse effects on my body and so I can't do it again, right?
Right?
Hello? Anyone with me?
Of course, this month is National Yoga month, so perhaps I should give it another try...
Have you tried yoga? Did you like it?
Tuesday, September 1, 2009
September Goals
Without further ado, my goals for September.
1. Run a minimum of 120 minutes a week, with at least one run covering 8 miles. I want to keep increasing my distance, and I hope to be up to 8 miles or more by the end of the month. I think I can do it! I am considering doing the St. Jude Half Marathon on December 5, so I need to stay consistent with my running.
2. Drink ONLY water for the entire month. No diet soda, no regular soda, no sweet tea, nothing.
3. NO eating after 8 p.m. This worked well for me last month, and I want to continue the practice.
4. Track EVERY bite of food I eat. I've gotten really lazy about doing this, so it's time to step it up and really pay attention to how much/when I'm eating.
5. Read two books. Given last month's miserable progress (or lack thereof) with this, I thought it best to scale back the number of books I want to read. I'm already halfway through a book called 10 Dumb Things Smart Christians Believe. Then I plan to either tackle a fiction book or read The End of Overeating.
6. Lose 4 pounds. I joined a Lose 10 Pounds in 10 Weeks Challenge on SparkPeople, and I am determined to start seeing some consistent weight loss again, so I'm sharing this goal with you all, even though I'm scared I won't be able to do it.
7. Continue the daily Bible reading plan. By the end of September I should be halfway through Job.
What are your goals for the month?
1. Run a minimum of 120 minutes a week, with at least one run covering 8 miles. I want to keep increasing my distance, and I hope to be up to 8 miles or more by the end of the month. I think I can do it! I am considering doing the St. Jude Half Marathon on December 5, so I need to stay consistent with my running.
2. Drink ONLY water for the entire month. No diet soda, no regular soda, no sweet tea, nothing.
3. NO eating after 8 p.m. This worked well for me last month, and I want to continue the practice.
4. Track EVERY bite of food I eat. I've gotten really lazy about doing this, so it's time to step it up and really pay attention to how much/when I'm eating.
5. Read two books. Given last month's miserable progress (or lack thereof) with this, I thought it best to scale back the number of books I want to read. I'm already halfway through a book called 10 Dumb Things Smart Christians Believe. Then I plan to either tackle a fiction book or read The End of Overeating.
6. Lose 4 pounds. I joined a Lose 10 Pounds in 10 Weeks Challenge on SparkPeople, and I am determined to start seeing some consistent weight loss again, so I'm sharing this goal with you all, even though I'm scared I won't be able to do it.
7. Continue the daily Bible reading plan. By the end of September I should be halfway through Job.
What are your goals for the month?
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