Golden Arches: 0; Erin: 1

Today I resisted temptation. I was craving McDonald's french fries ALL DAY, and I was *thisclose* to going through the drive-thru on my way home from work, but then I asked myself, "Do I need these fries?" (NO) "Will I regret eating these fries?" (YES) "Is the temporary enjoyment worth the additional calories, lack of nutritional value, and emotional grief I'll experience?" (NO)

So I didn't go. Instead I went home and had a whole wheat piece of bread. Not nearly as tempting as McD's french fries (which I still think are delicious even after watching Super Size Me twice and seeing this video), but guilt-free. I can live with that.

I also exercised this morning and did not pass out, so there's another accomplishment. A workout that does not end in unconsciousness = stellar! And to top off this day of achievements, I ate within my calorie range with really no problem at all.

Praise God for His goodness. Through His strength I am made strong.

A Scary Experience

I went to the fitness center at school this afternoon to work out since I missed yesterday, and I did a pretty routine workout for me: 20 minutes on the elliptical and 10 on the exercise bike. I did push myself more because I've been working on making each workout more challenging than the last so I don't fall into a rut.

Immediately when I stopped pedaling, I felt this pain in my head and kind of a "rushing" feeling. I sat there for a minute, trying to get my bearings, and then decided to try and get off the bike. Not a good idea, in retrospect. I remember standing up, then feeling dizzy, then the next thing I know the student working there is leaning over me, saying, "Are you okay? Can you hear me?" I completely blacked out!

Apparently a couple of girls saw me kind of fall over and at first didn't realize I had passed out until they came over and couldn't get me to answer them. They went and got the worker on duty, who in turn sent for a trainer who happened to be in the gym. She came in and took my pulse and my blood pressure and asked me a bunch of questions. I had eaten before I came and had drunk water, so I don't think I was dehydrated, but it is possible that I was overheated. The trainer recommended I take it easy for the rest of the day and tomorrow.

I'm feeling much better now; I was really shaken up at first, but I feel better now that I've had a nap and eaten dinner. I hope it never happens again, and I realized I need to be more careful and recognize my limits. Toward the end of my workout I felt kind of funny, but I ignored it, and I don't need to do that in the future.

The thought of missing my workout tomorrow kind of freaks me out a little because I know that is the reason why I'm losing weight, so I'm going to have to be extra careful with my calories. I also might try going on a leisurely walk in the afternoon, just enough to get my heart pumping but not enough to be strenuous.

One thing I've realized through this experience and through blowing it yesterday is that I'm not including God nearly enough in this process. I need to be so much more intentional about praying for God's strength and keeping focused on my true goal: to have a body and a healthy heart that glorifies God (thanks for the reminder, Glenna!). I want to love God mind, body, and soul, and that means honoring Him with my lifestyle. With Him, all things are possible.

Feeling Discouraged

I have got to figure out how not to blow it on the weekends! I know as long as I have the "who cares?" mentality on the weekend, I'm going to sabotage myself and never fully change my eating habits.

Last night we went to Buffalo Wild Wings, and I had an amazing buffalo chicken sandwich and fries, and then Hubby and I shared a peanut butter pie. Both of those were NOT healthy, but since it was my "splurge" day I didn't worry about it. But this afternoon we went to eat at Zaxby's (I guess we're really big chicken people), and I decided to be "good" and get a grilled chicken sandwich. I was so proud of myself, but then tonight when I looked up the nutrition info, I found out it was one of the worst things on the menu! I should know by now that restaurants are so deceptive, and that foods that appear healthy actually have hidden calorie killers. In this case, it was the bun the sandwich came on that really put the calories over the edge. All in all, I went over my calorie limit by about 250 calories.

I am just so disappointed in myself and also frustrated that I can't seem to eat as well on the weekends as I do during the week. I just need to learn that I always need to make healthy choices, and that's not always fun or ideal, but it is best for my body.

Some days I wonder, though, if I really want to have to worry about counting calories for the rest of my life. I know that if I want to keep off whatever weight I lose, that's what I'll have to do. And that kind of depresses me.

I could really use some encouragement / advice about this.