Today was a hard day. I started crying in my second class. At least my students know I care.
One of my very dear friends miscarried over the weekend, and I am heartbroken for her. I also feel incredibly helpless. How do you comfort someone in that situation?
Wednesday, February 20, 2008
Tuesday, February 19, 2008
Beginning Again
Classes resume tomorrow. I am anxious and excited, and I hope it goes well. I'm not really sure what to expect in terms of student morale, but I am just going to go into it with an open mind and try my best to be supportive. I saw a few students this afternoon at Wal-Mart, and they seemed happy to be back, but I kind of anticipate the stresses of school (with longer class times) and the stresses of new living arrangements to catch up with them at some point. Still, they could very well surprise me and come through the semester strong in their faith and strong in their schoolwork. With God all things are possible!
In the weight loss realm, I only lost 0.4 of a pound, so I'm not even really counting that. Considering the fact that we went out to eat three nights last week, I'm surprised I didn't gain anything. I've been proud of myself for being consistent with my workout, especially after the tornado prevented me from going to the school's fitness center. I think exercise is starting to become more of a habit, a natural part of my day, and I like that. I feel good when I exercise. It's a kind of accomplishment I'm not used to, but one that I definitely hope to keep achieving. Even though I didn't lose much at all this week, the possibility of losing those 100 pounds is becoming more and more real every day. God has been so faithful to give me strength and willpower.
I think I can, I think I can, I think I can...
In the weight loss realm, I only lost 0.4 of a pound, so I'm not even really counting that. Considering the fact that we went out to eat three nights last week, I'm surprised I didn't gain anything. I've been proud of myself for being consistent with my workout, especially after the tornado prevented me from going to the school's fitness center. I think exercise is starting to become more of a habit, a natural part of my day, and I like that. I feel good when I exercise. It's a kind of accomplishment I'm not used to, but one that I definitely hope to keep achieving. Even though I didn't lose much at all this week, the possibility of losing those 100 pounds is becoming more and more real every day. God has been so faithful to give me strength and willpower.
I think I can, I think I can, I think I can...
Monday, February 18, 2008
Week 4 Weigh-In
Down .4 pounds to 256 flat. I'm going to wait 2 weeks before weighing in again, since my TOM is coming up and that will probably reflect negatively on my weight loss.
Friday, February 15, 2008
Union: Looking to the Future
They're tearing down Hurt and Watters at Union.
I went to campus today so I could get copies made of my revised course reading schedule, and I couldn't help but notice the heavy machinery in the distance, picking up what used to be rooms (homes, really) and rubble and ruined student belongings and depositing it all in a big heap. And, like so many times this past week, I started to cry. (I really need to stop driving if I'm going to always turn into a blubbering mess.) Even though I only lived in Hurt one semester, I spent many hours there, and I know that others have very strong attachments to their time at Union, much of which was spent in a dorm room. It hurts to think that each of those rooms represents countless memories of late-night conversations, pillow fights, giggling at 3 am, procrastination, movie nights, fights about who would take out the trash or wash dishes, impromptu photo sessions, and who knows what else.
Yet even as I cried I was reminded of the fact that while the buildings are gone, the memories will live on, and it does not honor God to dwell on the past. It honors God when we look to Him for hope and renewal, when we come to Him with our burdens, for His yoke is easy and His burden light. It honors God when we store up treasures in heaven, when we remember that heaven and earth will pass away, but His Word will remain forever, when we cling not to that which is seen, for what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen eternal. It honors God to see His people glorifying Him in the midst of suffering and sorrow, in joy and triumph. It honors God when we stop thinking of ourselves and seek His face. Psalm 27:8: When You said, "Seek My face," my heart said to You, "Your face, O LORD, I shall seek." Seek His face, students and friends. Seek His face. All else pales in comparison.
I'll end with this song by Brooke Fraser, "Shadowfeet":
Walking, stumbling
On these shadow feet
Toward home, a land that I've never seen
I am changing
Less and less asleep
Made of different stuff than when I began
And I have sensed it all along
Now fast approaching is the day
CHORUS
When the world has fallen out from under me
I'll be found in you, still standing
When the sky rolls up and mountains fall on their knees
When time and space are through
I'll be found in you
There's distraction
Buzzing in my head
Saying in the shadows it's easier to stay
But I've heard rumours of true reality
Whispers of a well-lit way
CHORUS
Bridge
You make all things new
*A link to some photos of the demolition: http://www.flickr.com/photos/41208530@N00/sets/72157603912615373/
I went to campus today so I could get copies made of my revised course reading schedule, and I couldn't help but notice the heavy machinery in the distance, picking up what used to be rooms (homes, really) and rubble and ruined student belongings and depositing it all in a big heap. And, like so many times this past week, I started to cry. (I really need to stop driving if I'm going to always turn into a blubbering mess.) Even though I only lived in Hurt one semester, I spent many hours there, and I know that others have very strong attachments to their time at Union, much of which was spent in a dorm room. It hurts to think that each of those rooms represents countless memories of late-night conversations, pillow fights, giggling at 3 am, procrastination, movie nights, fights about who would take out the trash or wash dishes, impromptu photo sessions, and who knows what else.
Yet even as I cried I was reminded of the fact that while the buildings are gone, the memories will live on, and it does not honor God to dwell on the past. It honors God when we look to Him for hope and renewal, when we come to Him with our burdens, for His yoke is easy and His burden light. It honors God when we store up treasures in heaven, when we remember that heaven and earth will pass away, but His Word will remain forever, when we cling not to that which is seen, for what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen eternal. It honors God to see His people glorifying Him in the midst of suffering and sorrow, in joy and triumph. It honors God when we stop thinking of ourselves and seek His face. Psalm 27:8: When You said, "Seek My face," my heart said to You, "Your face, O LORD, I shall seek." Seek His face, students and friends. Seek His face. All else pales in comparison.
I'll end with this song by Brooke Fraser, "Shadowfeet":
Walking, stumbling
On these shadow feet
Toward home, a land that I've never seen
I am changing
Less and less asleep
Made of different stuff than when I began
And I have sensed it all along
Now fast approaching is the day
CHORUS
When the world has fallen out from under me
I'll be found in you, still standing
When the sky rolls up and mountains fall on their knees
When time and space are through
I'll be found in you
There's distraction
Buzzing in my head
Saying in the shadows it's easier to stay
But I've heard rumours of true reality
Whispers of a well-lit way
CHORUS
Bridge
You make all things new
*A link to some photos of the demolition: http://www.flickr.com/photos/41208530@N00/sets/72157603912615373/
Thursday, February 14, 2008
A Perfect Valentine's Day Quote
"I love you not only for what you are, but for what I am when I am with you."
—Elizabeth Barrett Browning
I absolutely feel this way about Stephen. I can't believe that we've been married for almost 9 months and together for 21. I am so thankful for him and thankful that God chose to bless me with him.
—Elizabeth Barrett Browning
I absolutely feel this way about Stephen. I can't believe that we've been married for almost 9 months and together for 21. I am so thankful for him and thankful that God chose to bless me with him.
Wednesday, February 13, 2008
Weight Loss Update
In all the craziness that has been the past week, I forgot to mention that I've now lost 5 pounds in 3 weeks. I think that's pretty good, and I hope I can keep that same pace!
Tuesday, February 12, 2008
He Changes Not
Late this morning Stephen locked his keys in his car, with the car still running, and I called AAA so we could get a locksmith out there. He just called me a half hour ago to see if I had heard anything, because they still weren't there, and turns out there was some miscommunication on my end, and after we hung up I just started bawling. I have no idea why. My emotions are all over the place, and I think I've kind of been absorbing all that's happened over the past week without really stopping to think about it or process it. I kept telling myself that if I kept working, I'd be doing something useful, and that would be enough, but the truth is it's not enough. In a way I need to stop thinking about it, but in another way I feel like I've only just begun to think about it. That doesn't even make sense, but I feel like my emotions right now don't make sense either. I have to remember that at times like this, when my emotions are running rampant and I feel frustrated and overwhelmed and angry and sad and worried all at once, that God is the steady, constant God He was, is, and always will be. He is the Lord, and He changes not. I don't have to be strong, because He is made strong in my weakness.
What a comfort that is when all around me seems to be changing! I keep thinking of Union and the memories I have there, and now some places I remember as part of Union will be no more very soon. My heart is breaking for Union, for my students. If I am this distraught over the tornado, I can't imagine what they're going through! I just hope they give themselves the freedom to fall apart, to truly let themselves feel what they're experiencing right now instead of bottling everything up or pretending they're fine. Yes, they are alive and God is so gracious to have spared them all, but they've also experienced a trauma, one that will be with them for many years to come, one that won't be easy to push to the back of the mind. I hope they can turn to each other and loved ones for support and be honest and open about what they're feeling, and I pray that the God of all peace will comfort and surround them with His love, that we would all remember to be still and know that He is God.
What a comfort that is when all around me seems to be changing! I keep thinking of Union and the memories I have there, and now some places I remember as part of Union will be no more very soon. My heart is breaking for Union, for my students. If I am this distraught over the tornado, I can't imagine what they're going through! I just hope they give themselves the freedom to fall apart, to truly let themselves feel what they're experiencing right now instead of bottling everything up or pretending they're fine. Yes, they are alive and God is so gracious to have spared them all, but they've also experienced a trauma, one that will be with them for many years to come, one that won't be easy to push to the back of the mind. I hope they can turn to each other and loved ones for support and be honest and open about what they're feeling, and I pray that the God of all peace will comfort and surround them with His love, that we would all remember to be still and know that He is God.
Thursday, February 7, 2008
The Latest Update from the President
The president of UU, not the nation. Ha. You can find this at the site uurecovery.com
* * * * *
Let me begin by once again offering our heartfelt thanks for everyone who has provided help, support, service and prayers for the Union University community during this incredibly challenging time.
At the 36-hour mark, we have moved from the emergency phase to the recovery and restoration phase of our efforts.
On Thursday, Feb. 7 our efforts will focus on helping students remove their vehicles from the campus.
Students and parents should report to the Chi Omega house to work with student life teams to retrieve their vehicles between 10 a.m. and 3 p.m.
Tennessee Guard will be working with Union security to retrieve undamaged personal goods from various residence life rooms Feb. 7-8. All personal belongings will be bagged and tagged so that students can retrieve their undamaged personal goods beginning on Feb. 18.
The damage not only to buildings and university property is severe, but the damage to student possessions and belongings has been equally severe.
All questions should be communicated through the switchboard at (731) 661-5000 or (731) 668-1818.
Faculty, staff and community volunteers who want to participate in the cleanup process are encouraged to report to Luther Hall at the south end of the university campus at 9 a.m. on Friday and/or Saturday, Feb. 8-9.
Union University friends who wish to help our students during this time of crisis are encouraged to support the university through the designated disaster relief fund or by providing gift cards to Wal-Mart, Target, Lowe’s or Home Depot for our students. Please send all monetary and gift card donations to:
Union University Disaster Relief Fund
1050 Union University Drive
Jackson, TN 38305
Gifts of gloves, trash bags, rakes, shovels, wheelbarrows and other materials needed to assist with the cleanup should be taken to Luther Hall.
David S. Dockery
President
Union University
* * * * *
I still don't see how we'll begin classes on the 18th, or where students will stay, or how they'll get textbooks for those who lost theirs in the storm, but God is not worried, so I'm going to try not to worry as well. Keep praying! Pray in particular for one of my students, David Wilson, who was one of the students trapped under debris for several hours and is still in critical care with injuries to his lungs, kidneys, and legs. Pray for healing and comfort and for God to strengthen him. Thank you all for your care and support!
* * * * *
Let me begin by once again offering our heartfelt thanks for everyone who has provided help, support, service and prayers for the Union University community during this incredibly challenging time.
At the 36-hour mark, we have moved from the emergency phase to the recovery and restoration phase of our efforts.
On Thursday, Feb. 7 our efforts will focus on helping students remove their vehicles from the campus.
Students and parents should report to the Chi Omega house to work with student life teams to retrieve their vehicles between 10 a.m. and 3 p.m.
Tennessee Guard will be working with Union security to retrieve undamaged personal goods from various residence life rooms Feb. 7-8. All personal belongings will be bagged and tagged so that students can retrieve their undamaged personal goods beginning on Feb. 18.
The damage not only to buildings and university property is severe, but the damage to student possessions and belongings has been equally severe.
All questions should be communicated through the switchboard at (731) 661-5000 or (731) 668-1818.
Faculty, staff and community volunteers who want to participate in the cleanup process are encouraged to report to Luther Hall at the south end of the university campus at 9 a.m. on Friday and/or Saturday, Feb. 8-9.
Union University friends who wish to help our students during this time of crisis are encouraged to support the university through the designated disaster relief fund or by providing gift cards to Wal-Mart, Target, Lowe’s or Home Depot for our students. Please send all monetary and gift card donations to:
Union University Disaster Relief Fund
1050 Union University Drive
Jackson, TN 38305
Gifts of gloves, trash bags, rakes, shovels, wheelbarrows and other materials needed to assist with the cleanup should be taken to Luther Hall.
David S. Dockery
President
Union University
* * * * *
I still don't see how we'll begin classes on the 18th, or where students will stay, or how they'll get textbooks for those who lost theirs in the storm, but God is not worried, so I'm going to try not to worry as well. Keep praying! Pray in particular for one of my students, David Wilson, who was one of the students trapped under debris for several hours and is still in critical care with injuries to his lungs, kidneys, and legs. Pray for healing and comfort and for God to strengthen him. Thank you all for your care and support!
Wednesday, February 6, 2008
Union University: What I Know
My heart is heavy today.
Last night around 7 pm a tornado struck my town, Jackson, TN, and hit the university where I attended and now teach, Union University. I experienced a tornado there my junior year, and while that was scary and there was some damage, the damage that was done last night is far, far worse. For several hours students were trapped under collapsed buildings, some dorms have been completely destroyed, and others have suffered extensive damage. 1,200 students live on campus at Union, and I praise God when I say that all of them survived this incredibly destructive storm. According to a press conference given by David Dockery, the President of the university, 51 students were taken to the hospital and 9 were kept overnight. While some had serious injuries, no injuries appear to be life-threatening. Those who were trapped have been rescued, and all students are either going home, staying with friends or faculty or at local churches and shelters. Please say some prayers for these students. After seeing some photos of the dorms, my eyes filled with tears because it is so shocking to see how just a few seconds of storm can cause so much damage, and I know the students must have been absolutely terrified, and some are probably still in shock. I love these students, and my heart goes out to them, and I pray that right now all of them are somewhere safe, feeling loved and cared for. As for the campus itself, much damage has been wrought. About 40% of the residence life buildings were destroyed and another 40% have widespread damage, leaving only about 20% in somewhat decent condition. One of the administrative buildings sustained damage to the second floor offices, one academic building (Pennick) has roof damage, and the two newest buildings, White Hall and Jennings, both have severe damage. I know the roof of Jennings is gone, and water damage seeped through all 3 floors, destorying a library of valuable books and countless numbers of musical instruments and other equipment. White Hall, which was just completed last year to the tune of about $20 million, houses many of the sciences, including the nursing department, so I imagine that the extent of the damage to the scientific technology there is significant. Virtually all of the buildings on campus except for one have some damage. Early estimates place the cost for repair in the $30 million range, but I imagine it will be much more. In 2002, the damage was $2.6 million. This is without a doubt the most serious event to strike Union. Classes are cancelled until Feb. 18, at the earliest. I can't even express with words how much I love this university, how much I love these students, how much I cling to my own memories of being a student on that great campus. I just ask that you join me in praying for Union students, and pray for the rebuilding efforts, as it will take many, many months to recover from this.
Last night around 7 pm a tornado struck my town, Jackson, TN, and hit the university where I attended and now teach, Union University. I experienced a tornado there my junior year, and while that was scary and there was some damage, the damage that was done last night is far, far worse. For several hours students were trapped under collapsed buildings, some dorms have been completely destroyed, and others have suffered extensive damage. 1,200 students live on campus at Union, and I praise God when I say that all of them survived this incredibly destructive storm. According to a press conference given by David Dockery, the President of the university, 51 students were taken to the hospital and 9 were kept overnight. While some had serious injuries, no injuries appear to be life-threatening. Those who were trapped have been rescued, and all students are either going home, staying with friends or faculty or at local churches and shelters. Please say some prayers for these students. After seeing some photos of the dorms, my eyes filled with tears because it is so shocking to see how just a few seconds of storm can cause so much damage, and I know the students must have been absolutely terrified, and some are probably still in shock. I love these students, and my heart goes out to them, and I pray that right now all of them are somewhere safe, feeling loved and cared for. As for the campus itself, much damage has been wrought. About 40% of the residence life buildings were destroyed and another 40% have widespread damage, leaving only about 20% in somewhat decent condition. One of the administrative buildings sustained damage to the second floor offices, one academic building (Pennick) has roof damage, and the two newest buildings, White Hall and Jennings, both have severe damage. I know the roof of Jennings is gone, and water damage seeped through all 3 floors, destorying a library of valuable books and countless numbers of musical instruments and other equipment. White Hall, which was just completed last year to the tune of about $20 million, houses many of the sciences, including the nursing department, so I imagine that the extent of the damage to the scientific technology there is significant. Virtually all of the buildings on campus except for one have some damage. Early estimates place the cost for repair in the $30 million range, but I imagine it will be much more. In 2002, the damage was $2.6 million. This is without a doubt the most serious event to strike Union. Classes are cancelled until Feb. 18, at the earliest. I can't even express with words how much I love this university, how much I love these students, how much I cling to my own memories of being a student on that great campus. I just ask that you join me in praying for Union students, and pray for the rebuilding efforts, as it will take many, many months to recover from this.
*** UPDATE: Stephen and I drove by campus a few hours ago, and what I saw brought me to tears immediately. The campus looks like a war zone. Dorms are rubble, trees are down, cars are upside down and strewn all over. It's unbelievable how much damage can happen so quickly. Seeing the damage firsthand only strengthened my love of the Lord and my praise to Him for sparing all lives involved. Certainly people are asking why this could happen, and I certainly don't have an answer, but I can't help but think, isn't it better to happen to people who know God and can spread His glory through this tragedy? Already there are testimonies on national news networks of the goodness and faithfulness of God. I pray that those who do not know Him would be moved by the faith of the Union community and seek to know the Lord we love and praise and worship, even in the midst of the storm. I pray faith will be strengthened, hearts comforted and renewed with love for Him and others, and lives forever altered for the Kingdom. Here's a link to some photos of the damage: http://www.flickr.com/photos/41208530@N00/
Visit uuemergency.com for more information.
Visit uuemergency.com for more information.
Monday, February 4, 2008
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